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  #391  
Old 27th May 2018, 16:12
Freyja Freyja is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I have a massive boner, bigger than everyone else on here.
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  #392  
Old 27th May 2018, 18:26
Vienna Vienna is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I've just won 50 million on the lottery and I want to share it with everyone. My phone number is 07549557438967 and if you can do an impression of geldolf saying ' give us your money!' you're in with a share
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  #393  
Old 31st May 2018, 18:24
Sunshine Recorder Sunshine Recorder is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I have slept with over ten thousand women.
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  #394  
Old 31st May 2018, 18:27
biscuits biscuits is online now
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Default Re: tell lies

Last year, when holidaying in Bavaria, I attended a sausage festival and some clumsy bloke dropped a Stein glass full of beer on my foot. Well, of course I was in agony and let out a prolonged yelp.

Thus resulting in me accidentally and unwittingly coming second place in a yodelling contest.

https://vocaroo.com/i/s12xa8YmQsqB
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  #395  
Old 31st May 2018, 20:00
Pink*Lady Pink*Lady is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I taught Theresa May to do her gurning face.
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  #396  
Old 1st June 2018, 17:23
Sunshine Recorder Sunshine Recorder is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I just registered for the naked Twister tournament at the UK Games Expo.
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  #397  
Old 7th June 2018, 19:52
Kooky Monster Kooky Monster is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

Eating too much lavender was the reason the Victorians went extinct.
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  #398  
Old 7th June 2018, 21:34
Sunshine Recorder Sunshine Recorder is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I lost in a spot-the-differences tournament to Stevie Wonder.
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  #399  
Old 8th June 2018, 21:26
Kooky Monster Kooky Monster is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

My fat, sluggish womb needs loving.
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  #400  
Old 8th June 2018, 22:00
tatzelwurm tatzelwurm is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

My fat, sluggish worm needs worm-loving.
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  #401  
Old 12th August 2018, 00:38
Raven. Raven. is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I died. No, really, I did die. Like proper death and stuff. But now I'm alive again.
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  #402  
Old 16th August 2018, 07:03
anxiouslondoner anxiouslondoner is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I'm a carefree cardboard penguin called Raul.
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  #403  
Old 30th August 2018, 00:01
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

before the permian extinction event, england covered almost half the globe
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  #404  
Old 20th October 2018, 23:54
Sunshine Recorder Sunshine Recorder is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

Because of my malleable vocal talent, I have been approached by 20th Century Fox Records to provide 'remastered' vocals for Barry White's back catalogue.
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  #405  
Old 29th January 2019, 19:20
Perhaps Perhaps is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

i didn't know i had a twin sister until 22
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  #406  
Old 27th February 2019, 11:30
Merritt Merritt is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

The Tina Turner song Steamy Windows is about cooking a Sunday roast.
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  #407  
Old 7th April 2019, 22:02
Deer Deer is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I once invited a towel to a party! It didn't leave the bathroom all night.
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  #408  
Old 3rd June 2019, 03:17
Laurel Laurel is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I am asleep
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  #409  
Old 25th June 2019, 18:22
annelliot annelliot is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

I would love to attend the event.
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  #410  
Old Today, 14:33
Bluebear Bluebear is offline
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Default Re: tell lies

My half sister is friendly and makes my life easier.
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