SAUK Discussion Board

Go Back   SAUK Discussion Board > General Discussion > Games Room
Join! Blogs FAQ Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Notices

Reply  Post New Thread
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 3rd January 2011, 00:04
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 26,000
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default tell lies

i found my entire childhood experiences from ages 6-10 on youtube.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 3rd January 2011, 01:25
Grogoch Grogoch is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Collecting twigs
Posts: 1,938
Blog Entries: 22

Mood
Torn

Default Re: tell lies

I procreated with a mutant, some time ago in the murky past. and today I gave birth to a mutant sproglet. and i'm calling her Sindy. She has gills. and green claws. i'm putting pink ribbons in her hair. and feeding her titanium
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 3rd January 2011, 03:55
Mortigantoj Mortigantoj is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Gants Hill
Posts: 16,232
Blog Entries: 25
Default Re: tell lies

I'm ok (trust me!)
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 3rd January 2011, 04:28
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 26,000
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

if you print all of my sauk posts out on A4 paper and lay them out in order in the shape of a square, it produces a square with sides 3 miles long. when viewed from 3 miles above, my text forms an image of myself pushing a lawnmower across the deck of the fully-crewed Mary Celeste.

viewed from a mile up you can see the follicles of my hair, and from half a mile up you can visually discern the structure of my dna. further zooming in reveals my constituent atoms with fully visible electron energy clouds etc.

this post corresponds to a hangnail on my left ring finger.


if the text is printed out in comic sans, the 3 mile square image is of myself brushing my teeth, wearing just a fez.


in times new roman the image is a magic eye picture* which, when focussed on correctly, yields a three dimensional image of a fully functional crystal ball, capable of foretelling any future event subject to a 3% degree of error.


lastly, if the accumulated posts are converted into morse code and printed out, and wrapped around a sphere of radius (3/3 of 3miles), at the centre of the sphere a small portal will form. if you put your hand thru this portal, you will feel the back of your own head.


the final shock is that i didn't make my posts do this on purpose, i just found all this out on hogmanay 2010 when i left my printer on overnight by accident.



*some have claimed that if you look at the times new roman image in a 3 mile by 3 mile mirror, a different magic eye image is formed. when correctly focussed on, this magic eye image reveals yet another magic eye image, ie a magic eye within a magic eye. when focussed upon correctly, this second magic eye reveals a 3d picture of two dolphins frolicing.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 3rd January 2011, 04:33
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 26,000
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mortigantoj
I'm ok (trust me!)

hope you are big chap, and thats no lie
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 3rd January 2011, 05:20
Rane Rane is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 5,421
Default Re: tell lies

Even though Isambard Kingdom Brunel, Hue Hefner and myself share the same birthday, we are all equally worth knowing.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 3rd January 2011, 08:49
-Simon- -Simon- is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cheltenhamstershire
Posts: 5,564
Default Re: tell lies

From 1979 to 1981 I worked as Peter Andre's official advisor in all his dealings with the DVLA. My grandfather invented the door.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 3rd January 2011, 11:06
xTKsaucex xTKsaucex is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: Newcastle
Posts: 4,011
Blog Entries: 1

Mood
Dreaming

Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fatty Arbottle
My grandfather invented the door.
Don't know why that's so funny.


Me and the Queen once got caught in a drugs bust in Morocco.

I found Saddam first

I got sacked from BP when I was dared to push the big red button on that oil rig.

The French are a good bunch of people
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 3rd January 2011, 11:41
-Simon- -Simon- is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cheltenhamstershire
Posts: 5,564
Default Re: tell lies

This one time, I bounced on my space-hopper so hard that it altered my DNA. Doctors said it had got all jumbled up on account of the bouncing I done.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 3rd January 2011, 11:52
marki marki is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Leeds
Posts: 702
Default Re: tell lies

I have fallen out with Tara Palmer Tomkinson and you can read all about it in this weeks News Of The World.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 3rd January 2011, 11:53
marki marki is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Leeds
Posts: 702
Default Re: tell lies

My doctor prescribed me midget gems for my social anxiety.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:01
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 26,000
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fatty Arbottle
This one time, I bounced on my space-hopper so hard that it altered my DNA. Doctors said it had got all jumbled up on account of the bouncing I done.

i have squashed dna too, in my case caused by bad posture.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:11
-Simon- -Simon- is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cheltenhamstershire
Posts: 5,564
Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by seth brundle
i have squashed dna too
It's no biggy. NASA asked if they could study mine, for the rocket stuff they do, but I had a dentist appointment.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:13
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 26,000
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by Fatty Arbottle
It's no biggy. NASA asked if they could study mine, for the rocket stuff they do, but I had a dentist appointment.

they tested my dna but abandoned the study because they quickly established that my dna "was not correct"
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:16
-Simon- -Simon- is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cheltenhamstershire
Posts: 5,564
Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by seth brundle
they tested my dna but abandoned the study because they quickly established that my dna "was not correct"
bummer. my uncle works for NASA, actually he owns it, so maybe I could have a word.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:16
Nuff Nuff is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Derbyshire
Posts: 149
Default Re: tell lies

I hate this topic ALOT!
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:18
-Simon- -Simon- is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cheltenhamstershire
Posts: 5,564
Default Re: tell lies

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nuff
I hate this topic ALOT!
I don't get it
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:26
Kevin Hodge Kevin Hodge is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: lazy town
Posts: 26,000
Blog Entries: 51

Mood
Sneaky

Default Re: tell lies

i dont want nobody else, i love you
(she's lying)
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:27
Mortigantoj Mortigantoj is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Gants Hill
Posts: 16,232
Blog Entries: 25
Default Re: tell lies

^
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 3rd January 2011, 12:58
-Simon- -Simon- is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cheltenhamstershire
Posts: 5,564
Default Re: tell lies

In 1872 there was a shortage of exclamation marks due to a strike by the National Union of Typesetters. Excitement was severely rationed and nothing extraordinary occured that year.
My uncle invented cheese in an effort to avoid the butter tax.
Reply With Quote
  #21  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:11
-Simon- -Simon- is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Cheltenhamstershire
Posts: 5,564
Default Re: tell lies

I'm not the man you think I am at all, oh no - I'm a Rocket Man!
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:23
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I was offered the role of peter parker in the original spiderman film, but had to turn it down due to my bond villain commitments.
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:26
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I used to be a famous 80's pornstar, but my allergies forced me to shave my moustache and chest hair, prompting my exit from the industry.
Reply With Quote
  #24  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:28
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

Jade Goody was a national treasure.
Reply With Quote
  #25  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:37
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I once piloted the ship known as the Stellar Envoy, long before it was repaired and re-christened the Millenium Falcon
Reply With Quote
  #26  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:38
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I murdered schroedinger and his bloody cat.
Reply With Quote
  #27  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:44
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I invented swiss cheese as a way of increasing my profit margins.
Reply With Quote
  #28  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:46
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I was born fully-literate and with an extensive knowledge of ww2 era bolt-action rifles.
Reply With Quote
  #29  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:47
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I once climbed to the summit of Kilimanjaro with the wu-tang clan and splinter from TMNT.
Reply With Quote
  #30  
Old 3rd January 2011, 13:49
LmaoZedong LmaoZedong is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NOT Peking
Posts: 12,059

Mood
Balanced

Default Re: tell lies

I provided the english dubs for all 151 original pokemon, as well as professor oak and Giovanni
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Forum Jump


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 16:18.


SAUK Award
Logo designed by abc
Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.