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  #1  
Old 25th June 2019, 15:06
Jimmy77 Jimmy77 is offline
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Default Single, childless and happy

Is anyone else single, or childless (or both) and perfectly happy with that? I feel like I ought to be more unhappy than I am. Truth is, I am much happier now than I ever was in a relationship. In fact, I've come to the conclusion that many are better off living alone and not having kids. When you think about it, it's unnatural to share a tiny brick box with a complete stranger (genetically, I mean) for 50 years, with all the bad smells, the lack of alone time, etc.

Yet I feel pressured to be more unhappy than I really am (just as people with kids or a partner feel pressured to act more happy than they really are). I'm scared of being old/ill and alone. But apart from that I love this - I have my books, I can come and go as I please, and I don't have the constant fear and stress that something will happen to my kids, or that my partner will leave me, or that my marriage is falling apart.
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  #2  
Old 25th June 2019, 16:16
Dougella Dougella is offline
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Default Re: Single, childless and happy

I don't have children and I'm happy with that. I think for many people being childless can be a completely happy state, I just feel more sorry for people who really would like to have children but can't or haven't found themselves in the right situation yet.
I didn't think I wanted to live with anyone either, definitely in my twenties getting all domestic with someone was the last thing I wanted! I think that being in a bad relationship or living with someone where it goes very badly could be really awful and make people miserable.
I'm living with my partner now and after a few bumps at the start it's actually gone well, I think because we're reasonably compatible in the way we like to live and we give eachother plenty of space. I don't have the constant fear that things will go wrong or my partner will leave me either, if it happens I can cope. I don't think that I would need to live with someone to be happy though.
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  #3  
Old 25th June 2019, 16:20
Indigo_ Indigo_ is offline
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Default Re: Single, childless and happy

I think if you're happy that way then that's absolutely fine There are those who wouldn't be happy in those circumstances though and find more joy in sharing their life and experiences with someone or a family. There are many upsides to be single and childless, but there are also many positives about being in a relationship and/or having children.
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  #4  
Old 25th June 2019, 18:21
Sunrise Sunrise is offline
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Default Re: Single, childless and happy

I'm in this situation and happy. I suppose it's because it's all I've ever known. Realistically I could never have a relationship as I have too many issues, and the amount of stress it would give me would make me very unhappy and cause serious problems for the both of us, even more so if kids were involved. These days I feel like even attempting a relationship would be a very selfish thing to do - I would put the other people involved through hell. My ambition in life now is just to try and make the most out of what things I know I can do rather than any silly unacheivable goals. It also means I'm completely independent and self-sufficient and am free to do what I want to do. It might be selfish but I like it that way.
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  #5  
Old 25th June 2019, 20:46
Toxic Toxic is offline
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Default Re: Single, childless and happy

if I'm honest I wouldnt mind some..occasional female company

But them thoughts are quite fleeting

I'm about a 2/10 on wanting to be with someone, maybe 1/10, I don't like all the added drama and commitment and having to take someone elses feelings into account..its much easier just being a single entity and doing what you want when you want, I'm sure a few people manage to find that absolutely perfect someone where it all goes smoothly but I've had a few cracks at it and none of them were worth hassle. I have enough hassle in my life during the working day, the last thing I want is round 2 in the evening

Kids, not a chance, never ever ever and I'm perfectly happy with that. Sometimes I try and think what would happen if I did actually have a child, could I get behind the idea...no, the thought mortifies me!

I'm generally happy with the fact I don't have kids or any other time sink and I can do whatever I feel like doing with my spare time (even if I don't due to anxiety - which is the main source of any unhappiness I may have)

I do sometimes wonder why I feel the way I do though, I know people who would literally throw themselves under a bus if they didnt have a relationship on the go..it makes me feel the odd one out because its really not something I value much! Is it suppose to depress me enough till I make the effort to have a partner and child? coz it don't! I work with someone who will never take a day off unless her partner is off work, she can't survive just having a day to herself, it sounds like heaven to me, boggles my mind being like that!

I also try and ignore the future, I know thats gonna be bleak
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  #6  
Old Yesterday, 03:47
Jane Doe Jane Doe is offline
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Default Re: Single, childless and happy

I'm definitely happy I don't have children - not that I've ever had the opportunity to consider that option! I'm not maternal and the world is such a horrible place so it's just as well.

Up until a few years ago being single didn't really bother me but now I'm passed it, it does When I was younger, if I'd have lived a normal life, I would have had options. Although it's unlikely that anyone would find me attractive now, a relationship would never work out because even my problems have problems. It wouldn't be fair to them to be lumbered with me.
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