Out of Place?

Ive been reading some of the forum and everyone talks about going out at xmas and new yr etc, physically going to support groups etc. I feel a bit out of place as I havent really read of anyone who is/gets housebound with their SA. I was starting to be able to goto meetings with my CMHT social worker but he is having to do house calls again. I cant even set foot out the back door to put rubbish in the bin atm. Ive also had PTSD for almost 15yrs but slipped through the net for proper therapy for yrs. Im currently waiting to start CBT but again was faced with feeling forced to have to travel to the next town for the assessment, fortunatly they did a home visit. It annoys me actually that these people deal with people like me everyday yet have no actual clue that "I cant travel far or cant leave the house at all" means exactally that.

I get so frustrated trying to explain to these so called mental health professionals I have panic attacks on the phone and have to hang up. I cant get to the doctors atm because I cant leave the house and I wouldnt expect them to come to me if its not an emergency as such so I cant even get something meds wise to help like I have in the past. Actually tbh ive never been as bad as this. I just feel numb all the time my head hurts now just trying to type this. Ive got so much anger and frustration locked away inside and just dont know how to deal with it. I dont wanna be a social recluse but cant let anyone in, I even hold things back from my social worker because I dont trust anyone 100%. I just dont know what to do for the best atm and that scares me more as im built around routine.

[hardy]

I know it doesnt help much but you would be suprised how many other SAers have similar problems. Obviously it would be very hard for you to meet them as they are hidden away, like you are much of the time .

[007]

I think that an expert would probably say that you can set foot out the back door to put rubbish out. Because if it is an anxiety disorder you are supposed to keep putting yourself in these situations and stay in them until the anxiety lessens. I think it is avoiding them that reinforces your anxiety.

I know panic attacks are really scary but when you have one on the phone I think you should be trying to stay on the phone for as long as possible. I think that maybe understanding that a panic attack is not a rational reaction to the situation can, on it's own help a bit and also making sure you are not hyperventilating.

[serenity]

l feel the same, have had SA for more years than l want to remember, dont leave the house unless l have some one with me, even then l find it difficult.Havent worked for nine years because things got worse. Am hoping that now l have found this site l will be able to share feelings/fears/worries with others so l dont feel so alone, and maybe try to rebuild a little.

[sammie]

i had agrophobia and it was just hpow you desribed, for 4 years, ihad no social contact only with my family as i was living with them, i didnt venture out the house at all! but surprise im recovered, i get days were i want to stay in now, but now i dont feel like im in a prision cell, i started to work on myself, i guess i cannt tell you how or what to do, as everyone is diffrent, i found going out gradullay without anyone bossing me to go out helped alot, i did it in my own time, i started but jsut going at 6 am in themoring when noone was around, and yes i used to peak around that door to see if anyone was around or even driving a car down the street, then id wait it out till all was clear, it started to get better, it took along time however, i was scared of meeting old faces, and thinking that everyone thought i was odd so would get called, none of this happened however, if i felt panic id go home and try again, i thought heck im hurting enough now, what else could hurt me the answer was nothing. it was a bit more seriouser to what ive described, but over the years now im in charge, i do what i want, and i dont take notice of everyone around me, though somedays i do, but not like before, it was consant people people people, now i dont think about it i dont knowhow i didnt htink about it but i guess over time and going out more i became more confident, also btw the meets are a good way, i caught the bus really early to go to london i was so sick but i did it, you can only try, but once in london i felt noone knew me so i felt safe.

you have to get to the cause of the problem what makes you stay in, i do things step by step,

but everyones diffrent what one found good another might not,

but im thinking of you and hope somehow everything will turn around for you

[shrinksrmad]

moodymare....hi can so relate....i spent 24 hours in a small room absolutely paralysed with fear.....couldnt eat or drink....or even open my front door....gutted....im a 36 year old MAN and i couldnt even open my front door...god love u for sharing that nightmare....its orrible innit m8....im like....all i got to do is put the bottles out....but wot if they clink and make a loud noise....its a hard one ptsd.....i know.....but hell im on me tod now......cheers

[crimson~raven]

I understand just how frustrating that can be, I remember being on the phone to the benefits agency trying to explain to the man on the other end of the phone that if I could leave the house to go to their assessment then there wouldn’t be a problem in that I would have a job if I could leave the house alone. It took a while, finally he got it but said I still had to go in to town I was taken by my then partner and had a huge panic attack in the assessment and had to leave. It makes no sense to me either why they don’t understand the disorders they are dealing with.

I leave the house if some one picks me up but I rarely leave on my own, only managing if I have no choice like going to work when my colleague can’t pick me up simply because I need to keep a roof over my head. However if I want something from the shop or just fancy a some fresh air I can’t do it. I have placed my outside bin under my window so I can just lean out the window to put things in. when it gets really bad I have to draw my curtains. I find it weird that at work I can leave the office some days to go for a walk yet not once I get home?

[Larry]

Originally Posted by Moody Mare

Ive been reading some of the forum and everyone talks about going out at xmas and new yr etc, physically going to support groups etc. I feel a bit out of place as I havent really read of anyone who is/gets housebound with their SA. I was starting to be able to goto meetings with my CMHT social worker but he is having to do house calls again. I cant even set foot out the back door to put rubbish in the bin atm. Ive also had PTSD for almost 15yrs but slipped through the net for proper therapy for yrs. Im currently waiting to start CBT but again was faced with feeling forced to have to travel to the next town for the assessment, fortunatly they did a home visit. It annoys me actually that these people deal with people like me everyday yet have no actual clue that "I cant travel far or cant leave the house at all" means exactally that.

I get so frustrated trying to explain to these so called mental health professionals I have panic attacks on the phone and have to hang up. I cant get to the doctors atm because I cant leave the house and I wouldnt expect them to come to me if its not an emergency as such so I cant even get something meds wise to help like I have in the past. Actually tbh ive never been as bad as this. I just feel numb all the time my head hurts now just trying to type this. Ive got so much anger and frustration locked away inside and just dont know how to deal with it. I dont wanna be a social recluse but cant let anyone in, I even hold things back from my social worker because I dont trust anyone 100%. I just dont know what to do for the best atm and that scares me more as im built around routine.

I'm housebound too The only time I leave the house is if I need something from the store or if I have laundry to do. I wouldn't even do that but I have to because I live alone and there's no one to help. Some days I don't even collect my mail as I live in an apartment block and I have to go to the post box which is at the building entrance. I'm sorry to hear that this is happening to you because I know the pain of it so well.

I think that it is happening to alot of people I'm encouraged though because there's alot of success stories out there. I'll be spending Christmas housebound and alone but I know I won't be the only one and that makes me feel less weird. Also the alcohol will help