How is everyone feeling? (31) - Page 124

newbs16 · #**3691** 14th March 2016, 08:51

^ Hope your feel a bit better soon.

Armadillo · #**3692** 14th March 2016, 08:52

^ Thanks, you too

Pink*Lady · #**3693** 14th March 2016, 11:55

Nauseous and anxious. Called in sick into work today so I'm in ****ing trouble. They're being really tough on sick days in work now, even genuine illnesses. I can't face all the passive aggressive behaviour in work at the moment. There's so much bullying and intimidation going on in general and nothing is being done about it. I'm feeling really low, anxious and unable to cope with my dark thoughts.

Pablo Huntsbach · #**3694** 14th March 2016, 14:46

Unmotivated. Can't be bothered to get up or go out of do anything. I can't be happy alone but I'm past the point where I can realistically expect anything else.

ynwa247 · #**3695** 14th March 2016, 18:16

I want to simultaneously shoot myself while duel wielding glock 12s, falling from a bridge while a train is coming so if the noose snaps the bullets or train will get me

this is while doing on heroin and sleeping pills obviously

pretty bad really

though i'm not sure i can afford the setup now my esa has been cut

Cognitive · #**3696** 14th March 2016, 18:33

Very sorry to hear you are suffering Jjoe. Is there anyone you can talk to about how you feel?

Not feeling to good myself. Girlfriend broke up with me last night.

Grumpy Young Man · #**3697** 14th March 2016, 18:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cognitive

Not feeling to good myself. Girlfriend broke up with me last night.

Sorry to hear that. Hope you're ok.

Tembo · #**3698** 14th March 2016, 19:29

Very close to giving up my well-paid, big responsibility job. I've never experienced stress and depression on this level before. Its quite scary. And lets just say, shit is about to hit the fan, as I have to deal with a trade union. I don't want a job like this, and all the jobs I feel I'd be comfortable with are mostly minimum wage, or just above. I don't care so much about money, I'd rather be happy, but I'd like to give something back to my family in the future.

I feel very guilty about all this. My family (mum especially) have given me so much. Brought me up well, and I've had a comfortable upbringing. My mum saved up money to help fund my university accommodation. I feel like I'm wasting all my education. And I feel I'm letting my family down. They are supporting me of course, and say if im so unhappy in this job, I should leave. But I still feel like I'm letting them down.

I'd love to reach a point where I don't constantly feel like a complete failure.

newbs16 · #**3699** 14th March 2016, 19:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cognitive

Very sorry to hear you are suffering Jjoe. Is there anyone you can talk to about how you feel?

Not feeling to good myself. Girlfriend broke up with me last night.

I'm sorry to read this, are you okay?

Cognitive · #**3700** 14th March 2016, 20:25

Thanks Grumpy Young Man and Newbie. I could see it coming but it still hurt. These things are never easy.

Grumpy Young Man · #**3701** 14th March 2016, 20:28

^^^^Sounds stressful. Your work wouldn't put you in that role though if you weren't able to do it so you are capable as much as it might not feel like it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Telex

I feel very guilty about all this. My family (mum especially) have given me so much. Brought me up well, and I've had a comfortable upbringing. My mum saved up money to help fund my university accommodation. I feel like I'm wasting all my education. And I feel I'm letting my family down. They are supporting me of course, and say if im so unhappy in this job, I should leave. But I still feel like I'm letting them down.

This is the bit to sort out. You're putting a lot of stress on yourself which must feel terrible. You got to where you are so you definitely haven't wasted anything or let your family down. I know it's easy for me to say that but I'm speaking as someone who's been in that situation.

Grumpy Young Man · #**3702** 14th March 2016, 20:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cognitive

Thanks Grumpy Young Man and Newbie. I could see it coming but it still hurt. These things are never easy.

Thet never are. Don't know if it helps but times like these are the best time to do something completely different that you've always wanted to do but never done before. I went travelling after my last break up (which I would normally never do thanks to my SA). Not suggesting anything as extreme as that but it's always good to treat yourself to something.

Merritt · #**3703** 15th March 2016, 01:34

Feel pretty drained today.

Later this week I'm meant to be going to a Recovery College course that's in a place just outside the city. I've been offered a lift by my support worker, but I really wanted to try getting there myself. It's been really bringing up a lot of bad feelings lately relying on people to do things for me like that. So today I tried doing a sort of trial run, to boost my confidence for when I go for the course.

Getting to the village was a bus into town, then a bus out there, and wasn't terribly complicated. I sort of knew where the place the course will be at, and walked in that direction, but I couldn't find it. There was no sign whatsoever. I walked for about half an hour, circling back to get the bus home. Then when I got on the bus, I showed my day ticket to the driver, and he was saying something I couldn't hear through my headphones. It was unexpected, and I didn't know whether he'd said anything to me or someone else or I'd just imagined it. Finally when I got my headphones off, I realised he was saying I had to pay extra to a certain point, presumably because the day ticket wasn't valid this far out. Then I got really paranoid, and the feeling stuck. It's such a small thing, but it's like... imagine walking along, you're in control, nothing out of the ordinary is happening, then someone suddenly punches you in the face. That's how it felt. The bubble I was in was suddenly popped and my anxiety went through the roof. I legitimately thought I was going mad until I got home, like I thought everyone I passed was looking or laughing at me out of the corner of my eye.

I ended up feeling completely off-kilter the rest of the day, and this evening I self harmed for the first time since January. Feel really mad at myself that something that I tried to do to make myself feel more confident and prepared only left me feeling more vulnerable and insecure, and I'm not sure I'll actually go to the course now. Also mad that something so hilariously trivial as the ins and outs of bus fares could affect me so much. I keep wondering why I get referred for therapy for personality disorders, maybe it's because I feel like I've been dropkicked in the heart when my day doesn't go entirely as planned and someone says something slightly unexpected to me.

Sorry, needed to get that off my chest.

kirbycrackle · #**3704** 15th March 2016, 02:45

^ hope you're okay merrit

newbs16 · #**3705** 15th March 2016, 02:55

^^ You might not see if but there are positives to be taken from the above post, hope things improve for you x

newbs16 · #**3706** 15th March 2016, 08:33

How I hate morning anxiety

newbs16 · #**3707** 15th March 2016, 11:51

^^ Thank you

Merritt · #**3708** 15th March 2016, 13:04

Thanks Newbie & Miggs

Yeah, I guess there are some positives I could take from the experience. It's just disturbing when you're shown just how fragile you can be, kind of hard to see past that.

Hope your day gets a bit less stressful as it goes on, Newbie.

Pablo Huntsbach · #**3709** 15th March 2016, 13:57

Woke up feeling lonely and nostalgic. Wish I knew why I seem to repel people.

SpaceMonkey · #**3710** 15th March 2016, 16:16

Woke up feeling very anxious, after having a very vivid dream where I was on the Apprentice.

Sunshine Recorder · #**3711** 15th March 2016, 20:16

Everything feels so boring, and I just can't enjoy anything at the moment. I can't go on living like this.

purplerose · #**3712** 15th March 2016, 21:27

Lonely

newbs16 · #**3713** 15th March 2016, 21:51

Really tired.

Grumpy Young Man · #**3714** 15th March 2016, 21:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by purplerose

Lonely

That's never a good feeling

Tembo · #**3715** 15th March 2016, 22:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grumpy Young Man

^^^^Sounds stressful. Your work wouldn't put you in that role though if you weren't able to do it so you are capable as much as it might not feel like it.This is the bit to sort out. You're putting a lot of stress on yourself which must feel terrible. You got to where you are so you definitely haven't wasted anything or let your family down. I know it's easy for me to say that but I'm speaking as someone who's been in that situation.

Thanks

I guess I feel I'd let them down once I actually leave. But they'd prefer id be happy I suppose.

booplebum · #**3716** 16th March 2016, 00:15

I think the past year has been the worst of my life so far. Now, when there should be a bit of breathing space, other stuff is going wrong. Everything feels constantly ominous, I am ever ready for catastrophe. I wouldn’t be surprised if the end of the world were announced in the papers tomorrow…

Custard_cream · #**3717** 16th March 2016, 13:51

Fed up. Noise is really stressing me out today. Just want to sit in a quiet room with no stress and no noise.

Sunshine Recorder · #**3718** 16th March 2016, 14:05

Fed up of everything. I feel the need to get away from everyone and everything for a while.

Dougella · #**3719** 16th March 2016, 15:19

^ Doctor's appointment for you!

Dougella · #**3720** 16th March 2016, 15:35

^ Good, when there's blood you must go. I'm not sure what 'nutty brofessor' reasons are, but i'll assume it's probably good to go and talk about those too.