#1
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Body Dysmorphic Disorder
Anyone else been diagnosed with this?
I was diagnosed with it last year, but have been experiencing symptoms since my late teens. In fact I would say that most, if not all, the anxiety I experience in social situations is due to the way I perceive how I look. Any ideas on treatments etc? Personally although I found cbt immensely helpful in overcoming my social anxiety, I've found the techniques pretty usless when trying to tackle BDD-related thoughts. |
#2
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I have it, I'm a skinny person by nature, always think I look skinnier than I am and have been trying unsuccessfully to gain weight for the last 12 years. I've stayed 140lbs the whole time.
No idea what to do with it to be honest, I've just gotten used to it. |
#3
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I was told I have this, too-- but in my case, I feel as if it was a bit of a cop out of a diagnosis-- a label given to delude myself and make me feel better about my ugliness. Some people are just conventionally unattractive. The sooner I accept this, the better. Can a conventionally ugly person have BDD? I don't know. Enlighten me, folks.
I don't mean ANY disrespect by what I said, by the way. These are just my thoughts on my own experiences. Much love to you all x |
#4
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
Yep. Yep. Yep.
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#5
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I'm not sure if this could apply to me. I do sometimes feel like my appearance is just wrong somehow. I'm very insecure about how I look, but that's mostly based on specific things, and I feel like my insecurity would mostly go away if I could fix those things. Still there is that feeling that I just don't look right, so I don't know.
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#6
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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I've made some big improvements in the last year or so though. While I do have mostly same worries and experience the odd off moments, I'm no longer constantly preoccupied with thoughts about my appearance, and worry about others' evaluations of it to a lesser extent. It would be facile of me to claim that any one factor has contributed to this improvement, though one thing that I believe has accompanied it is a greater sense of 'owning' my appearance, which sounds horribly seventies' self-help, but does seem to characterise the relationship I now have with this fleshy, calico husk I carry about. I think that's probably involved acknowledging that there are aspects of my appearance that aren't the way I'd like them to be (far from it, in most respects), while learning to accept them as they are and coming to realise that just because I don't like them it doesn't mean others won't, with a dash of: no-one's going to tell me who I am or can be based on the random genetic shuffling that's for the most part produced my particular facial topography. |
#7
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
^ Yep. And I believe it's quite common (at least for those who struggle with this sort of thing). I reckon it's probably the case that everyone's face can look different under different conditions, but it's those that are particularly concerned with their appearance who are more keenly aware of it.
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#8
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I'm the same. I also feel like people won't recognise me, because I don't look like anyone, or people have to get a good look to figure my face out.
This thread as me wondering. |
#9
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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There have been a few occasions when I'm looking at myself in the mirror (totally sober, I promise) and just for a moment, I'm convinced I could play a Dornish girl in Game of Thrones. I feel gorgeous. Then, suddenly, I feel like Brienne of Tarth. Meh. |
#10
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I have been told I have this, but some people just are ugly, no point in telling them they have BDD. I don't have it I'm just not good looking.
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#11
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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#12
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I think I can be attractive, but my skin lets me down. Always has. I'm 27 now, but I still have the complexion of a teenager. Just pores and red marks and general shit everywhere. I get so focused on it sometimes I wonder if it really is as bad as it really is and I'd just focus on something else. Meanwhile, my physique is one of a twig, and on me it's ugly no matter what spin I put on it.
On the plus side I accept my obvious failings a lot more now. I'm more successful these days about going about my life and putting to the back of my mind that I look like scum. |
#13
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I probably had BDD when I was younger - I couldn't look at my reflection without feeling physically ill. Or maybe I was just ugly. I 'fixed' my teeth, my skin, my hair and my dress sense. I learnt to accept my crooked nose. My two younger sisters might've had BDD-like issues too, they've both had nose jobs. I do think it was a lot to do with us being so alien looking and not fitting in (we're 2nd gen immigrants).
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#14
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I met a nurse today who said she had BDD in the dy rehab centre, but she was just not good looking.
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#15
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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#16
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
i hate BDD, just no escape from it.
i love bodybuilding and whenever i look and feel great i can't help but compare myself to pro bodybuilders and it immediately puts me down, can never be content or happy. facially? im the polar opposite to what most of society would find appealing. probably why i love bodybuilding so much, at least i can be the polar opposite totally and take it to the extremes. |
#17
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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How can that be? I realise lighting has an effect, with fluorescent and bright overhead lighting bringing out everybody's flaws, but surely it can't make that much of a difference? I'm worried I'm just stubborn and in denial about my appearance, as in... I want to believe I truly look more like the less repulsive me that I see when I look into mirrors in flattering lighting, so am continuously horrified when I see myself in more 'accurate' situations. Maybe I just have an odd face that catches the light in funny ways? I know my badly textured skin varies widely in its appearance depending on what lighting I'm stood in - in dimly lit places it's sometimes not even noticeable, yet in others I can resemble Freddy Krueger. It's pretty distressing and anxiety-inducing. And when I've tried to explain to someone before what I experience, they just acted like I was crazy. I suspect they probably were just used to seeing me as the 'worst' version of myself I'd seen, whereas I've always been in denial about looking like that, so any 'difference' was only noticeable to me. That's still a rather scary thought. |
#18
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
i won't paint all women with the same brush, because as generic as it sounds, people are different!
but i think you're probably right, most women probably would prefer that look just like most men would prefer women with a certain look - this is why i don't judge anyone by their looks, because it's something we have no control over! the amount of times attractive women or men get an undeserved opportunity over someone less attractive is just frustrating for me to see. looks, height, facial structure is all a genetic lottery. no control over it yet we get judged on it so frequently. not by everyone but by a lot of people. but one thing you can definitely control bud, and that's your physique! (and character of course!) you can control and influence those greatly, if you're unhappy with your body you can change it's composition...massively! a short guy can look more aesthetically appealing than someone taller if you know what you're doing. some of the best phyisques to have walked this planet have been circa 5'7 |
#19
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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#20
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I don't understand BDD.
I don't know if I have it or not. Sometimes I think I look alright, but there are things about my appearance that I don't like and these things are not in my head and have affected my life negatively. I see people here, very good looking people who are told time and time again by other very good looking people, and not so good looking people, that they are very good looking, but won't accept it because they see a distorted image of themselves. But surely, there must come a point when they accept what every single person us telling them, and not the image they see? I've read that BDD is about seeing a distorted image of yourself looking back at you, and also that BDD is obsessing about body parts, facial features etc that don't look distorted. One of the things I hate about myself are my ears. I've never seen anyone with ears like mine, they are unique lol, and no end of ***** took the piss out of them growing up. I know I'm not seeing a distorted image of them for instance. However, sometimes I look at my face and think I look good, and other's I think I look weird, but I don't see a distorted, twisted monster looking back at me like some people claim to see. |
#21
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
What criticism have you had mate because I've seen a picture of you before and a couple of partial pics and you look fine.
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#22
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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seeing things which are unrealistic, a very lean person thinking they look fat, maybe from a distorted reflection and keeping that image in their head. i've got over mine to a certain extent but i feel small all the time, its something that probably will never leave but at least we can get some form of control over it maybe? people who are unhappy with their body image when there's actually reason to be unhappy and they're not creating a distorted view, imo that's not BDD and i get annoyed when people think it is. it's not, they're just unhappy with reality, they're not creating a false reality. it skews the condition for people with actual BDD, which angers me to be quite honest because they put they put their bodies through extremes while the people who don't suffer actual BDD don't, yet they think they suffer the same pitfalls. |
#23
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
I believe, at least in some cases, there is a biological aspect to this condition akin to OCD. Its an inability to cope with uncertainty. Each look in the mirror may produce a different result, so the sufferer copes by engaging in the ritual of repeated looking in an attempt to reassure themselves. You never really get there and, even if you do, its only ever temporary. In my experience, I firstly accepted the thing(s) I didn't like myself (counter-intuitive) and then began preventing this cycle. It did feel like a weight off my shoulders and giving the mind a bit of space helps it gain perspective.
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#24
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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who made the rulebook on what's beautiful/ugly anyway? women who i find beautiful, most people i know find unattractive and most women they find beautiful, i find unattractive. probably psychological too. but i don't think it's unhealthy at all to have accepted your flaws (if they're flaws at all) but even better is to be unrestricted by them and not place emphasis on them or on peoples' meaningless opinions of them. one thing i've learnt recently (wish i did a lot sooner!) is that peoples' opinions mean absolutely SOD.ALL. most people are sheep. this mindset has helped my anxiety quite a bit. |
#25
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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(I don't think I have BDD, though, just insecurity) |
#26
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#27
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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#28
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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The key words in your post are "overly sensitive". I wonder how many people bullied you? I guess it was like a handful of jealous girl bullies tops, like a gang, and you focused on there lies when they told you you were ugly. Maybe they thought you were weird more than ugly because of your natural quietness, but you focused on the ugly word more than the weird word. You must have had lots of guy's tell you you were good looking at the same time you were being bullied. You did end up having kids as a young woman and have had relationships since, and get told all the time here how good looking you are and how young you look for your age. I felt the same as you and hid away, feeling like a freak, because people always took the piss out of specific features, which are real, and not in my head. So I ended up obsessing about these features, and that brings me back to maybe two forms of BDD, where you see a distorted image of yourself, or obsess over features that do stand out, or obsess over features that don't stand out no where near as much as you think. I just know that if I was better looking I wouldn't be on here now and would have experienced life and love together, instead of bloody hiding away and and being alone for my entire adult life. It's hard when you come on a site like this, and reach our age (I'm a year younger than you) and you've just had no social life at all really for nearly two decades. You just feel like you're at the bottom of the barrel amongst your own people and like you've gone ****ing mad. |
#29
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Re: Body Dysmorphic Disorder
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I've started going hiking and camping and it's bloody hard work and character building, and you end up interacting with loads of strangers. I find people coming up to me for general chit chat, advice, and even myself going up to others and asking them things or helping them out, or just being interested and curious in what they've been up Public transport of all kinds is a breeze to me now, eating out, going into strange pubs at night etc When your doing hard exercise and freezing your tits off on mountains it sort of makes you stronger and anxiety goes out of the window, and then you feel relaxed when you get back to civilization and have to do all the modern world stuff again. In fact it's nice to go around the city and indulge in modern comforts without being paranoid and nervous. So that's what's helping me now, and i'm a world away from the person who spent years hiding away, afraid of the window cleaner etc seeing me. lol Still got a huge fear of trying to actually really get to know someone in person though, and trying to maintain it. |