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Old 2nd December 2006, 09:43
Freespirit Freespirit is offline
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: In the kitchen with the candle stick
Posts: 2,719


Default More ramblings

I have given alot of thought to life the past couple of months or so. I am always trying to figure out what i want out of it etc. Of course i want money and nice things but i think the one thing more important than anything is simply to be happy. Being happy does rely on having money. I need money to survive in todays world, so therefore i do want a nicely paid job. Once i find a job that is nicely paid and one that i can handle doing everyday, then that will be a big chunk of my life sorted.

So then...what would make me happy?

simple...friendships. In fact friendships is what makes a job bareable or not. So much of life is about how we connect to other people and of course as people suffering from SA this is very difficult.

So i know what i want out of life. I want to be able to connect to many people. To have a good circle of friends, both online and offline. Then i will be happy and i know now that everyday for the rest of my life, i will strive to improve the friendships i have now and work on making new friendships where ever i can.

Alot of my life so far i have been searching for hte "one". That one person who will make it all better. That one romantic intamate relationship that makes me feel special but i am beggining to realise that if i did ever find that, there is a huge possibility it wouldnt last when it ends..what would i do then?..i would fall back into my depression and would have few people around me to make me feel ok. So i think that by making many intamate relationships i can get to a point where a rarely feel lonely.

So, i have decided that i will put my energies into building strong lasting friendships based on trust, honesty and love. It will be difficult but i can do it. We all can. Im not really sure why i am posting this. I am just lonely at work and reaching out for a bit of human contact.
Old 2nd December 2006, 09:54
chensilvas2803 chensilvas2803 is offline
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: South Africa
Posts: 15
Default Re: More ramblings

I agree with what you are saying Freespirit!

I think ultimately I'd like to be able to know that no matter what happens in the future, I can count on myself not only to just "survive" but to enjoy the experiences that are thrown across my path.. To really live, thats the goal I'm moving forward to achieve. There's been too many times in my life that I've put far more into other people than what I got out - only to realise that I never valued myself enough to begin with. So the the time alone isn't such a bad thing for now, cuz it'll be worthwhile!

Significance of Solitude

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