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  #1  
Old 1st December 2006, 14:52
Philix Philix is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 28
Unhappy Suicide feelings ?

Being a solitary person I have always needed to keep myself extra busy I took up programming in multiple languages, learnt website design to the stage where Iím making a living out of it and spend all my ďgoing outĒ money on things like games and computer parts.

But now I find myself bored of it all I would even go as far as saying bored of life, nothing seems to take my interest anymore and I guess I feel a bit depressed. In what seems like a last resort I have joined to every meet up I can find. I know that just being there will make me uncomfortable but Iím hoping it will relieve the boredom enough to make me able to at least get out of bed in the morning.

Iím not really the kind of person who would kill themselves but it feels like thatís the way my life is heading its lost all value and interest but at the same time its made me a bit numb to feelings as well. I guess I have adopted the mentality of it doesnít matter if I do this because I wont be here soon. Which has had a positive influence its made me actually talk to random people in the street there reaction is always *omg someoneís talking to me Iím going to die must stare at feet and walk faster* but I suppose it counts as socializing.

I have also spent more time outside in the last few weeks than I have in the last three years, I have tried really hard to socialize with the aim of getting a friend, even know I feel like Iím going to crunch up and die on the inside when I go over and talk to people. I wouldnít recommend it to anyone I mean seriously people take being talked to by someone they donít know so badly they are either really rude or cant even look you in the face as you talk to them and these are the normal people Ö

Ö There should be a support group for people whose only friends are people from online games that they have never met and people from msn who they wont ever meet.

oh well I guess its back to work

Philix

  #2  
Old 1st December 2006, 15:03
Tiger Tiger is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 93
Default Re: Suicide feelings ?

I know what you mean, people are generally withdrawn in the current world we live in.

I too had similar feelings as yourself, suicidal, but not really taking things that far. I would have never have gone that far but when asked would say. I wouldn't mind if I were to die.

However, my sister who had Social Phobia (which I never know about) commited suicide and that really jolted me and I have made an effort to improve ever since.

Making progress but hard work, the best way out is through they say!

Take care and see your doctor if you start to get too depressed!
  #3  
Old 1st December 2006, 17:15
007 007 is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 468
Default Re: Suicide feelings ?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Philix
Being a solitary person I have always needed to keep myself extra busy I took up programming in multiple languages, learnt website design to the stage where Iím making a living out of it and spend all my ďgoing outĒ money on things like games and computer parts.

But now I find myself bored of it all I would even go as far as saying bored of life, nothing seems to take my interest anymore and I guess I feel a bit depressed. In what seems like a last resort I have joined to every meet up I can find. I know that just being there will make me uncomfortable but Iím hoping it will relieve the boredom enough to make me able to at least get out of bed in the morning.

Iím not really the kind of person who would kill themselves but it feels like thatís the way my life is heading its lost all value and interest but at the same time its made me a bit numb to feelings as well. I guess I have adopted the mentality of it doesnít matter if I do this because I wont be here soon. Which has had a positive influence its made me actually talk to random people in the street there reaction is always *omg someoneís talking to me Iím going to die must stare at feet and walk faster* but I suppose it counts as socializing.

I have also spent more time outside in the last few weeks than I have in the last three years, I have tried really hard to socialize with the aim of getting a friend, even know I feel like Iím going to crunch up and die on the inside when I go over and talk to people. I wouldnít recommend it to anyone I mean seriously people take being talked to by someone they donít know so badly they are either really rude or cant even look you in the face as you talk to them and these are the normal people Ö

Ö There should be a support group for people whose only friends are people from online games that they have never met and people from msn who they wont ever meet.

oh well I guess its back to work

Philix

I think maybe you are just really,really bored and only bored of the life you know as opposed to life in general. Maybe you are fed up of the strictness of computing and need to try something creative and arty.

It's great thast you are looking to meet people but I think unfortunately some people are very closed off to meeting new people and when they are just going about their regular routines or whatever, there are certain situations where they are probably either really busy or are just not looking to meet new people. I think also peoples uniformity will often include only being friends with people of a similar age and background which is their loss because they don't get to talk to a wide variety of people.

If you think that your social skills aren't great or want good tips on meeting people then there are probably some good websites linked to reality shows where they coach people to make them more confident, etc or just google a few words like confidence, social skills, tips etc. I think there might be some pages on the bbc site about this.

Are you single and if so is this part of your loneliness?

What are these meet ups? Are they for specific interests or just general socal things?

I bet there is a support group for people like you mentioned and it will almost certainly be, ironically, on the internet.

Good luck with everything.
  #4  
Old 1st December 2006, 17:52
Philix Philix is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2006
Posts: 28
Unhappy Re: Suicide feelings ?

Yea, actualy no im worse than single i have knowone

The meetups im going to are to meet other people with SA there from many sites and prety much fill up my weekends from now till xmas however the meetups are in public places not online

As for arts i draw paint etc but everything just feels so repetative ...

I just hope it helps to socialise ...
  #5  
Old 1st December 2006, 22:49
Moksha Moksha is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 2,309
Default Re: Suicide feelings ?

Boredom is a classic symptom of depression. I remember someone on TV who was trying to describe depression saying "imagine one morning you wake up and look at something that means a huge amount to you, say a classic car you have been cleaning up and restoring, and it just seems flat, uninteresting, boring and meaningless"
  #6  
Old 1st December 2006, 23:24
shrinksrmad shrinksrmad is offline
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Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 57
Default Re: Suicide feelings ?

if you kill yourself youll only come back, i think you maybe depressed as once you was so into your job and learning but now your not.....i think you want more out of life but your not going and getting....were all a bit suicidle here...but look soldiers die and want to live.....ahem...so chins up eh.....x
  #7  
Old 2nd December 2006, 23:58
ozy123 ozy123 is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 85
Default Re: Suicide feelings ?

i study computer science and I felt like that for a long time. I thought I was on the wrong course but didnt know what else to do. After I tackled my depression and social anxiety and made lots of progress I found myself becoming hugely interested in everything including my studies.
I think you gotta figure out if your not socialising enough, or if you dont have satisfactory relationships ro maybe self esteem and depression issues. Its really tough to navigate yourself through all difficulties but persistence always pays off.
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