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  #1  
Old 21st June 2019, 18:12
spiritualove spiritualove is offline
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Default Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please help.

Hi everyone

I've just signed up here as last night I had a bit of SA visting my partners LARGE family. I wasn't aware that I suffer from SA but I've gradually come aware of it and it goes away back to my party years. I'd have good fun and enjoy the effects of recreational drugs when I was a lot younger but then that all changed when I was in my 20s hence why I don't dare to touch them. I would end up feeling severely paranoid at parties etc thinking everyone was judging me etc. I'd end up crying and freaking out and a friend said to me they don't know anyone who has ever cried on MDMA or cocaine. Is that normal for someone with SA?

As mentioned I don't dare to touch drugs and haven't for a very long time. However I still get the same paranoid way at times when meeting new people or large groups of people. I was absolutely fine when I went to my partners parent house then after a couple of hours I just totally freaked out and ended up with brain fog, dry mouth etc. I ended up arguing a bit with my partner after it and struggled to sleep last night overthinking it all. It's playing on my mind today. I have had depression etc in the past and do get stressed etc but I don't have actual panic attacks because my mum has them and they are different. Also I'm not a shy person but when I get like that I just get total brain fog and struggle to concentrate because I'm totally engrossed with how I'm acting and all that stuff. I don't want this becoming a problem with my partner. He has 7 siblings and I'm an only child which I'm concerned will be an issue. I really hope not but I'm worried about going back over in future because I literally freaked the hell out!
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  #2  
Old 21st June 2019, 18:43
Aelwyn Aelwyn is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

It doesn't quite sound like SA, since you were all right for a long time. Maybe you're so frightened to go back to the way you were after the drugs, that you're now a bit neurotic about it and almost expecting to have this reaction to social occasions? As if the fear is triggering your behaviour.

I know with SA, and with other phobias and fears, that this can happen - the more times we get panicky, the more we tend to be tense and worried about it happening again, and so the whole thing snowballs.

I wonder if CBT or counselling would help?
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  #3  
Old 21st June 2019, 18:51
spiritualove spiritualove is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

Thank you very much. Yes, that makes a lot more sense. I have had counselling already. It helped in some aspects but this social dilemma still really affects me. I just wish it would go away. Another example is when we were out in the garden talking and the kitchen window was open, it's like I'm fully aware of that and keep thinking they are listening to every word that I say! Just total paranoia I think but a lot of the time I avoid going to the shops etc so I don't have to speak to people but when I do rarely do it it's never as bad as the anxiety before I go.
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  #4  
Old 21st June 2019, 18:51
Rocket Spud Rocket Spud is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

Were you mixing drugs on any of those occasions?

Standard advice here, but: lay off the tea/coffee/fizzy drinks, cut the junk food, exercise and sleep. Reduce any stressors where possible.
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  #5  
Old 21st June 2019, 18:54
spiritualove spiritualove is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

[QUOTE= I wonder if CBT or counselling would help?[/QUOTE]

I've been thinking about CBT...it's most likely the best next step forward I think.
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  #6  
Old 21st June 2019, 18:58
spiritualove spiritualove is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rocket Spud
Were you mixing drugs on any of those occasions?

Standard advice here, but: lay off the tea/coffee/fizzy drinks, cut the junk food, exercise and sleep. Reduce any stressors where possible.
Thank you very much for your advice.

Yes, I had taken a lot of drugs back in my days and cannabis often which I regret the most....I hate the stuff! It was just because every bf I had smoked it. I was more than happy to give it up but think it's ****ed my head!

I do eat quite a bit of junk food and don't exercise. I'm going to start yoga in mornings. I don't usually get a good quality sleep however can oversleep at times through exhaustion I think.
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  #7  
Old 21st June 2019, 20:25
Ghost_ Ghost_ is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

I think it sounds like CBT would be good for tackling your feelings of paranoia, it's good for helping change your perspective and question the automatic thoughts you have in these situations.

I think it's quite normal to feel a bit stressed meeting a partner's family at the best of times, let alone if there's loads of them! Hopefully it will get easier for you.
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  #8  
Old 21st June 2019, 20:25
Rocket Spud Rocket Spud is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

I won't say much about drugs cos the side effects vary from person to person, just be sensible and clue yourself up.

Good luck with the yoga
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  #9  
Old 21st June 2019, 21:27
Mr. Nobody Mr. Nobody is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

There's a few people on here who have arrived at SA through drug use mainly, I've had my fair share of drugs and it's no doubt contributed to my mental instability,

You do sound like you can reason your way out of this and see sense, I mean, you can see it's all in the mind, the paranoia etc.

It's good that you are already fully aware that it's illogical behaviour and are not believing or buying into your own temporary illusions.
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  #10  
Old 22nd June 2019, 20:52
spiritualove spiritualove is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ghost_
I think it sounds like CBT would be good for tackling your feelings of paranoia, it's good for helping change your perspective and question the automatic thoughts you have in these situations.

I think it's quite normal to feel a bit stressed meeting a partner's family at the best of times, let alone if there's loads of them! Hopefully it will get easier for you.
Thank you very much. I phoned a helpline yesterday and explained a lot. The woman was very nice and completely agreed the same as you do. It's a CBT course that is newly available in Scotland. They are going to phone in about a month for an hour long phone call assessment. This could literally be life changing! Can't thank everyone enough for all your support and advice on here or I may no have phoned.
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  #11  
Old 22nd June 2019, 20:55
spiritualove spiritualove is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rocket Spud
I won't say much about drugs cos the side effects vary from person to person, just be sensible and clue yourself up.

Good luck with the yoga
Hey, thank you very much. Was speaking to my friend yesterday and she has the same struggles from time to time. We mutually agree that cannabis is the culprit because we smoked it a lot in our early teens. We then googled it and because your brain is still developing at that age it can mess with your head later on in life.

Thank you about the yoga...still to start it! Lol but it is the weekend! Ha ha!
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  #12  
Old 22nd June 2019, 21:01
spiritualove spiritualove is offline
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Default Re: Do I have SA? I'm not shy. Was it because of drugs or general anxiety? Please hel

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Nobody
There's a few people on here who have arrived at SA through drug use mainly, I've had my fair share of drugs and it's no doubt contributed to my mental instability,

You do sound like you can reason your way out of this and see sense, I mean, you can see it's all in the mind, the paranoia etc.

It's good that you are already fully aware that it's illogical behaviour and are not believing or buying into your own temporary illusions.
Thank you very much for your understanding and giving me that reassurance that it's all in the mind. I do feel a lot better today and signed up for a new phone CBT course that's started in Scotland so hoping that will help. I just wish all these teenagers and young people would know the prolonged effects of taking drugs....if it was back to the future you would certainly say NO!
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