'People' lessons

[EddieVedder]

I've often thought that schools and colleges should include mandatory courses/modules on effective communications and how to deal with people of all backgrounds and beliefs.

As we are growing up and developing our belief systems and outlook on life we come across a whole range of scenarios relating to people and I strongly feel that if there were such courses when I was at school then I would be able to deal with people in a more effective and confident manner so that interactions wouldn't be so difficult.

Assertiveness for example. Learning how to respect yourself and your opinion without being overtly aggressive because you don't know how to deal with the situation or on the flip side giving in and accepting others as better than you and thus eventually losing all self esteem and sense of worth.

Also learning how to deal with people who hold higher office than you. For example, most jobs I've had have been like Ted from the Fast Show. Every time my boss would show up i'd clam up and not want to speak. I absolutely HATED any interaction with managers to the point where reasonable or not I hated them.

These are just examples. I'm sure there are many more but it's odd how the education system wants you to learn and remember generally pointless algebraic equations that 99% of students will never need again yet learning and developing how to basically fit into society at perhaps the most influential and critical period in ones life is not considered important apparently.

It's fine getting loads of A star GCSE's but if you can't talk to people and be confident in yourself then they aren't likely to do you any good I don't think.

Many mental health problems stem from issues around the school / college time period and any problems individuals have could be addressed there and then and stopped at source to save further difficulties ahead.

Rambling on a bit so apologies but i'm amazed that nobody in education has considered this as far as i'm aware given the massive rise in mental health problems in society.

Any of you lads and lasses have any thoughts? Be great to hear them.

[flumpsy]

I can imagine seeing successful adults who are in boss positions that kids may want to work towards discussing things on an even level with students would help lots but when I was at school the best we got was an assembly where we all had to shut up and they gave a well planned talk to us.

There is no way you would get me talking to students though, terrible things students (JOKE, my SA talking)

Something I have noticed, and have noticed this through my teens into adulthood, and this is from a very small sample group of similar people and may be entirely inaccurate, but people from private school tend to be better at giving off confidence when talking to adults, peers or authority. Even those who are not actually confident and may be riddled with self doubt just have a way of appearing confident and speaking to those in authority on a more even level.

It may be that they already passed a test to show they were able to get in to private school, that must give a bit of confidence but I suspect it may be partly the way they are taught.

[Shining*]

Nice idea, unfortunately we are expected to know these things by default

[ZooWeeMama]

I think it's a great idea. If you were taught at a really young age it would be easy to implement, like teaching manners. Learning conversation and greeting as manners also, it probably would have helped in my family, where we weren't taught to greet people when they entered a room, or use manners at home, only outside. I make sure my kids are expected to behave the same at home, so that they don't go out into the world having to put on an act.

[umm]

I've had this exact same thought. Algebra and maths and all that is all well and good, but there should be some instruction just about how to function in life. Of course, most people don't need this, or they get it naturally, or at home (and it is a job for parents to handle this too). Emphasis might be placed on how to handle confrontation, how to find methods that work for you, finding your voice, centring yourself, just dealing with group and power dynamics. There can never be a one size fits all approach though.

I suppose all this is why self help gurus make so much money

[MenopauseM]

totally agree with this
I have always envied my Hubbys manner with people, his whole family are so well spoken & well mannered, make their point very well

whereas I sound like a squeaky slurring idiot who doesn't know what I am talking about.
I guess this is why people go into amateur dramatics, or learn public speaking

but yes, I am very aware I talk over people & don't listen enough. Argh!

[indiegirl1980]

I read an interesting article recently which said that the hard to quantify quality of 'charm' was just as important, if not more so, than having qualifications.
It gave the example of two interns at a firm whom they called Jane and Sarah. Jane was fully qualified but up herself, moaned all the time, slagged off the company on Facebook, and was miserable the whole time. Sarah made the effort to be pleasant to everyone, did everything that was asked of her and was cheerful.
So Jane got let go while sunny Sarah was made permanent staff.

As for private schools, when there are 12 of you in a form instead of 30, everyone has to say something, whereas in a class of 30 a whole sea of people either don't get asked or hide at the back.