top 100 things you should never say to someone with SA! - Page 5

Glas Eo An Oabl · #**121** 3rd March 2009, 21:43

"It's not that you can't do it, you just won't do it."
My dad said that to me once regarding going to my neighbour's house to thank them for my birthday card. I was so hurt that my own dad thought I was just being lazy and stubborn. I cried my eyes out XD

"It's about time you did [simple thing I can't do] now."
It seems like up until the age of 18 it was okay for me to not be able to answer phones, buy things in shops etc, but now that I'm officially an 'adult' I have to automatically be able to do these things.

"You're not going to survive in Uni."
Thanks, thanks for the support, guys.

"Rhian, you can read the next paragraph.."
Oh for the love of god I cannot read out loud to save my life D: never mind in front of a class of people I don't know. Agh >.<

b1814 · #**122** 3rd March 2009, 23:50

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnonymousLaura

"billy-no mates!" (I often wonder who this billy was)

had the name originated recently , id say it was me

b1814 · #**123** 3rd March 2009, 23:59

I've had the situation many times, im in a group, i see an opportunity to contribute, and then someone goes..

"wait..wait...hes going to say somthing"...

WELL I WAS GOING TO!!!!

alll eyes on me

doomlord · #**124** 4th March 2009, 00:40

1. ' Look, even his neck is going red.'

2. Passing someone I used to work with in the job I had before college, while at college ...' Communications? You didn't communicate much when I knew you.' not too mention the fact i was sitting with someone from my class when it was said.

3 'Boring Bastard'

4. 'Your not saying much, whats wrong'

5. The 'whats wrong' one is very common, or was for me anyway.

6. Oh f**k, how could I forget..???.(college class debate thing, all go into our little groups) afterwards....(pointed at me.... ''god its like trying to get blood from a stone!'' (all because I foolishly said I'd done a course on the subject of psychology, it was suggested by the teacher I'd be able to tell the group what it is in a nutshell. Yeah, like I'm a teacher of psychology suddenly...

Medea · #**125** 4th March 2009, 01:00

"What would you like to happen next?" or "What would you like me to do for you/about it?" Said by a doctor. Not having a degree in medicine I get completely stumped by that. I wonder if they ask people who've come in with a fractured wrist what they'd like them (the doctor) to do next?

CatchMeIfYouCan · #**126** 4th March 2009, 01:35

Quote:

Originally Posted by AnonymousLaura

"What would you like to happen next?" or "What would you like me to do for you/about it?" Said by a doctor. Not having a degree in medicine I get completely stumped by that. I wonder if they ask people who've come in with a fractured wrist what they'd like them (the doctor) to do next?

God yeah I can identify with the stupidity and ignorance of some doctors,

a doctor I went to see in my last surgery said to me patronisingly,
"So why are you on all these horrible medications?"
I was like "because one of your other partners prescribed them to me" (obviously?!?) what the f*s wrong with some of these people?
And a psychiatrist said to me just as I was leaving an assessment recently,
"so what did you expect and want to happen here today"
I just thought who the hells diagnosing who here?
(perhaps they were fishing for ideas who knows)
In some circumstances it seems sense to whizzin' well diagnose yrself as they are evidently stumped by anything non-physical,
Sorry to rant over this thread btw

but makes me so angry its ridiculous

Medea · #**127** 4th March 2009, 02:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by Poda

And a psychiatrist said to me just as I was leaving an assessment recently,
"so what did you expect and want to happen here today"
I just thought who the hells diagnosing who here?

I get that so often! It's horrible. Half the time I have no idea what to say. Or they'll say "What do you think will happen if we do x?" or "What are you hoping for out of this treatment?" and apparently saying "To get better" is not enough. :rolleyes:

Duffley · #**128** 4th March 2009, 02:21

I once was refusing to do PE the teacher dragged me over forced the bat into my hand got someone to pitch and hit it, she then yelled so absolutely everyone in the hall turned

"show some enthusiasm!!"

Grabbed my arms and waved them wildly in the air cheering...

Boutsofit · #**129** 4th March 2009, 12:26

Your looking well !

Well I don't feel it !

Your looking quite pale ?

That's funny I feel good actually !

KIK · #**130** 4th March 2009, 21:52

Hmmmm what about someone saying...
"Whats your problem?"
or
"Come on spit it out!"
or
"Speak up!"
or
"Are you mentally ******** or something?" - (Just a note.. because I was quiet child, people thought there was something mentally wrong with me, so I ended up in a special school. One day the school decided that they were going to send me to the local college to do a morning class. The college put me with a group of people with down's syndrome thinking that this was the total of my mental capacity)

marlo · #**131** 4th March 2009, 22:47

cheer up

Ruby1 · #**132** 5th March 2009, 09:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by KIK

Hmmmm what about someone saying...
"Come on spit it out!"

I may actually kill the next person who says that to me

Nother one although it's not actually about sa as such, me mum bless her, love her to bits but for so many years as i was growing up i heard this from her....

"DEPRESSION DEPRESSION! i tell you what, i don't have time to be depressed running around after 4 kids all the bleedin time"

(Well mum i also have kids but depression seemed to choose me, i didn't choose it)

It has definately made it harder to speak to her about my problems, shes a lovely person but i'm sure she never will understand mental illness.

challangerchris · #**133** 5th March 2009, 10:24

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ruby1

i'm sure she never will understand mental illness.

I'm finding that the only people who understand mental illness's are those who have experienced it for themselves.

I was very ignorant to mental illness before I started suffering, I didn't understand it - I'm not sure I even believed in it, its only now that I can relate to what people have said to me previous to me having a mental illness.

My bad!

Ruby1 · #**134** 5th March 2009, 10:47

I agree Chris..... errm.... not that you're bad, honest

I think it's understandable, it's kinda like someone asking us what it feels like to have a wooden leg, i guess, unless you actually have one you can only imagine it'd feel a bit wobbly!

Your post reminds me of when i was a kid, i was quite a confident little madam back then, i can remember so well a girl in first year secondary, she'd stand by the wall not make eye contact, she appeared to have no friends and looked pretty darn miserable. Back then i remember thinking 'how strange', but not once did i go up to her and ask her if she was okay, and i have always regretted that ever since, when i wish someone would talk to me, at times i have thought my sa is someones idea of punishing me, or to make me understand. But i know that's daft talk really. Hindsight aye it's such a great thing.

Freespirit · #**135** 5th March 2009, 13:20

SPEAK!

I have had someone shout that at me before, shortly followed by some insults about my hair colour. It was my best mate at the time.

I don't blame him for it becuase looking back I know he didn't understand why I was quiet (worse than quiet...I made everyone tense) and was just frustrated. Despite how mean he was on this occasion he actually stuck by me through an aweful lot and it's only in retrospect that I realise how amazing he was.

Shanibandangle · #**136** 5th March 2009, 15:37

Quote:

Originally Posted by Freespirit

SPEAK!

I know what you mean, I hate that.

Someone once said to me "Wow, I have NEVER heard you speak before."

I also hate "Say something!", when people find out i'm Scottish. LIKE ****ING WHAT!?

Blumoon · #**137** 5th March 2009, 15:43

'Hey guys, today we've got a seating plan'

Ohno.

Teachers loved seating plans in s grade subjects, move the chatty folk from their pals etc.
Prolly like this,So teacher's readin the names out...eg bla, there, blabla, next to him.
Then the teachers hasny shouted me yet, so am gettin anxius..
Oh maz, you sit there, and *one of the mouthy rebels* next to maz.
Mouthy kid kicks up 'Aw naw am not sitten next to her'
Teacher - Yea you are.
Mouthy kid - no fxckin way.
That goes on etc etc, am blushin ir somethin..or nrli cryin.
Mouthy kid gets sent out of class for refusin 2 sit down.
And it's all because of ME.

Always wondrd y folk wouldny sit next to me but all the rumours prolly made them not want to, even thou a was usually nice an just did ma work.
I always liked the folk i could trust and no wonder i believed a was hated at skool..half of they kids did actual hate me.
Biology, lol.. i was thinkin of biology..that's the class the lesbian rumour started n i was 2 shy 2 just say 'it isny fxkin true' some of the wee gits didny kno wat to believe..
But ih was rli embarrasin that they kinda things happened in front of ma teachers.
Thinkin about those things i don't miss last yr, cos most idiots left skool..
I saw a cuppo of boys from my art class in tesco & they weren't actually nasty to me, showin us all that bullyin is just a show off hing.
They aw only did it 2 be kool. They always actually got sad if i cryd ir that

I'm sure some of yies can relate to that. D=
I duno y i was thinkin about last yr.
It's prolly cos am leavin. Duno

*the fact that they kids wer more willin 2 get sent outa class thn sit next 2 me is shockin tbqh,
mind yu they didn't wanna be there in the 1st place =|
x

Shanibandangle · #**138** 5th March 2009, 15:52

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2oShawtyo9

I'm sure some of yies can relate to that. D=

Wrong. The more I read of your stuff the more I think back to how my old High School was like. ****ing shitehole. :rolleyes:

I remember once this guy called John was persistent to bully me to the death and I genuinely don't know why. He wiped ink from his pen on my neck and I told everyone that he had stabbed it in my neck, which was pretty funny. He also once put pins on my chair (How cliche) and I did sit on them but it was funny how I kept my facial expression blank while he expected me to scream in pain or something.

On top of all that I could tell people hated sitting next to me too. I was too boring for them, and wouldn't talk to them or offer any help. Had a nasty rumour spread about me which I haven't repeated since leaving that place, although one of those nasty words had miraculously found itself into my new school which was painful because then you realise that it must be true.

iloverain · #**139** 5th March 2009, 15:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2oShawtyo9

.
I saw a cuppo of boys from my art class in tesco & they weren't actually nasty to me, showin us all that bullyin is just a show off hing.
They aw only did it 2 be kool. They always actually got sad if i cryd ir that

x

That's peer pressure for you. People just want to conform and fit in and most do it so they don't stand out from the crowd and become targets themselves.
The sad thing is most people when on their own or away from the crowd will actually be o.k kinda people,not that helps much though.

KIK · #**140** 5th March 2009, 16:29

I remember when I was at school.. I was 10 years old and queuing for my dinner. The Headmaster (Richard Carter.. LOL I even remember his name) came up to me and said "Why are you looking so upset for?" he pointed to some people in wheelchairs, "They have a reason to be sad, you don't!".. What a wonderful guy.. I wonder what he is doing now?? maybe he is Satan's Lover with Saddam Hussain.. He loves them threesomes does Saddam.

Median · #**141** 5th March 2009, 16:39

I'l meet you in '*enter meeting place*'
I hate having to meet somebody somewhere, i think arghh what if there not there and they stand me up and everyone sees me as a loner. I usually make sure i set off to a destination with a person now. Very anxiety provoking.

squarebiz · #**142** 5th March 2009, 18:08

.....was doing overtime last night after working all day was really tired, and some loud mouth arsehole gave me that 'Cheer up darling, it might never happen'

.... for some reason thats the one that just makes my blood boil especially when its people i dont know, to me its just a stupid thing to say to someone you dont even know.

Sphinx · #**143** 5th March 2009, 18:22

"What's your name again?? " said by a vet nurse at the place i have volunteered for for 6 months.

My old counseller: "I just don't know what to say to you. Sorry that sounds really bad doesn't it?" Err yes! It makes me feel pretty doomed actually

Can relate to a lot of stuff in this thread!

Jessabel · #**144** 5th March 2009, 18:42

A choice one from today:
'Jess went to uni, she'll tell you, it was just one giant orgy wasn't it?'

Er yeah, whatever you want.

Or in fact any dumb question or remark that assumes that I live a normal life......

Louise Marie · #**145** 5th March 2009, 18:44

^ lol

AAAli · #**146** 5th March 2009, 18:46

Quote:

'Hey guys, today we've got a seating plan'

I used to HATE teachers saying that, I just want to sit beside my friends!!

Quote:

"What's your name again?? " said by a vet nurse at the place i have volunteered for for 6 months.

Ouch! I get that too. I was in a class for a yeah and people didn't know my name

Quote:

.....was doing overtime last night after working all day was really tired, and some loud mouth arsehole gave me that 'Cheer up darling, it might never happen'.... for some reason thats the one that just makes my blood boil especially when its people i dont know, to me its just a stupid thing to say to someone you dont even know.

I have never heard that before but I don't see why it is a bad thing to say to someone with SA. They are not saying it to put you down they are saying to cheer you up or get a reason for why you look so sad.

little_helen · #**147** 5th March 2009, 19:20

"How would you rate your confidence out of 10?"

and

"You HAVE to be confident!"

-- a potential employer speaking on the phone to me.

squarebiz · #**148** 5th March 2009, 19:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by AAAli

I have never heard that before but I don't see why it is a bad thing to say to someone with SA. They are not saying it to put you down they are saying to cheer you up or get a reason for why you look so sad.

When he said it i was in a fairly good mood despite being really tired. I was just getting on with my job minding my own business.
People often say it to me in the past which used to make me think that i must look really miserable all the time, then i start to feel selfconscious of looking miserable.......oh well maybe its not an sa thing, maybe its just me

When im anxious i do have a serious look on face though.

realitynut · #**149** 5th March 2009, 20:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by squarebiz

.....was doing overtime last night after working all day was really tired, and some loud mouth arsehole gave me that 'Cheer up darling, it might never happen'

.... for some reason thats the one that just makes my blood boil especially when its people i dont know, to me its just a stupid thing to say to someone you dont even know.

Yeah i know, i usually get that from the people with the clipboards in town, when i'm just walking minding my own business, not a great way to get me to talk to them, by insulting me.
I've also got it from a couple of waiters in restaurants, lets just say i've never gone back, why do people have to be so ignorant

AAAli · #**150** 5th March 2009, 21:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by squarebiz

When he said it i was in a fairly good mood despite being really tired. I was just getting on with my job minding my own business.
People often say it to me in the past which used to make me think that i must look really miserable all the time, then i start to feel selfconscious of looking miserable.......oh well maybe its not an sa thing, maybe its just me

When im anxious i do have a serious look on face though.

yeah I know what you mean I really do but when people say that they don't mean it as an insult, more an attempt to communicate with you. They mean it in a good way to cheer you up or find out whats wrong, at least in my experience. When people tell me to cheer up I just smile back and say I'm tired that normally starts a conversation and the person is very friendly.

Quote:

Originally Posted by realitynut

Yeah i know, i usually get that from the people with the clipboards in town, when i'm just walking minding my own business, not a great way to get me to talk to them, by insulting me.
I've also got it from a couple of waiters in restaurants, lets just say i've never gone back, why do people have to be so ignorant

How is that insulting you in anyway? Obviously they didn't think it as an insult otherwise they wouldn't have said it (they are trying to sell after all). Also how is that ignorant? People are just trying to start a conversation with you and you get offended and probably ruin a part of your day.