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Ive lost interest in everything
I am writing this because I am in total despair. Not for the first or last time. I have completely lost interest in everything. By the way, the height of summer does not make me feel one jot better.
Its just thatI am cut off from humanity(especially evenings and weekends). I cannoit take any more rejection so I dont venture anywhere new.The few contacts I have are strictly office hours only(Mon-Fri) and cannot help me outside these times. Ive tried friendship sites on the web but I find I have nothing to talk about. I despise all modern TV, films, music and sport, I detest "celebrities" or "over hyped no marks" as i prefer to call them. I am bored rigid with discussing weather. I could frankly strangle the next person who says "nice day" or "rain again" ( I wouldnt, but you know what I mean.). I feel as though I have broken down in some way(Ive tried the medical profession - they are useless and I cant afford private help). I feel my life is over at 47. Ill never be liked or taken seriously. As I have said before "Nice day Mrs Jones" is not and never will be my way. I need something meaningful not trivial. I just dont look forward to anything any more. i feel excluded from life(serioius not trivial). No one has ever taken me seriously. ive always been let down in some way or other. Ive given up hope thgat i will ever work or be in a relationship with a womIm sorry I am very down today.an but can never be content with it or make the most of it. |
#2
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
It seems like a case of depression - I recommend you see the doctors and maybe you can be put on medication which might give you quite a boost.
If you're too anxious to see the doctors you could try ordering a self-help book off the internet. Self-help has improved me so dramatically, but I needed the guidance of the books to know what I was doing. A book I bought recently - although I haven't read it all yet, is called 'Overcoming Depression' by Paul Gillbert which will help you find direction in what to do next. You can buy the book for £7.49 from Play.com http://www.play.com/play247.asp?pa=s...K&title=378828 Hope this helps. |
#3
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
Yes, definitely sounds like bad depression. I know whenever I've had episodes of major depression I always lose interest in everything.
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#4
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
Yep, that's a classic symptom of depression. It's particularly bad for those of us who tend to rely heavily on having interests - I don't have much in my life besides mine, so when sustained depression hits and I lose my enthusiasm for them then I feel doubly empty.
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#5
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
I can totally relate to your post Infamy, infact I could have written most of it myself. It certainly does sound like you are in the grip of depression and, like TheDonn suggests, a visit to your GP to inquire about medication should perhaps be one of your first ports of call, if you haven't tried this already?
My depression has become so severe this past year that I'm seriously considering taking a course of anti-depressants myself. Of course, I keep putting it off for a tomorrow that never comes because I can't even sum up the energy to visit my GP. (Emote: shake) I've tried countless anti-depressants over the years and, to be honest, they didn't particularly alleviate the SA but, in hindsight, they did seem to at least give me the energy and motivation to start tackling the SA in other ways. I suddenly found the motivation to step outside of my comfort zone, I joined a social anxiety group, and felt strong enough to reach out to other like-minded people and, best of all, I actually started to feel interested in living again. Sadly, while my motivation is so low and everything in life seems pointless all of these things are impossible, and day by day the feelings of isolation and desperation continue to grow and the depression just gets worse and worse. (Emote: bricks) I guess sometimes the depression needs to be treated before social anxiety can be tackled. Anyhow, enough of my unhelpful ramble! Why don't I ever follow my own advice? (Emote: rolleyes) All I really wanted to say, Infamy, is that you're not alone and I hope that things start to improve for you soon. (Emote: smile) [1 edits; Last edit by Scottidog at 20:46:29 Sun Jun 19 2005] |
#6
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
Thanks everyone. im sorry if I sounded horrible in my post. I try not to be orrible most of the time. I expected a kick up the posterior(theres still time yet!). I have been on various anti-depressants for over ten years- my current one is Cipralex 10mg.
Can i point out that the problem is not at GP level - with other problems I have he is quite good - the problem lies at the level of psychiatrist and other mental health professionals. Those i cannot change because of catchment areas. |
#7
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
Please don't apologise Infamy. You didn't sound at all horrible in your post, just very unhappy with your current situation, which is understandable.
You mention that you are on Cipralex. Hasn't that helped to alleviate the depression at all? 10mg sounds like quite a low dose?? I'm curious, because that's the anti-depressant I'm thinking of trying. Like you, I've tried various anti-depressants over the years but I haven't tried Cipralex, which I've heard some quite good reports about. I guess what works for one, doesn't always work for another though. (Emote: ohwell) I can sympathise with your experience of psychiatrists and other mental health professionals as they were unable to offer me much help either, although this was many years ago when social anxiety was virtually unheard of. To be honest though, the private psychiatrist I used to see only ever dished out pills, and at the end of 30 minutes would send me a £100 bill! Has your GP ever offered to put you in touch with a CBT therapist...someone who has a real understanding of the treatment of SA? You mentioned that you've tried friendship sites on the web with little success. What about considering attending one of the SA meets, if you haven't done so already? Everybody would be in the same boat, and I'm pretty sure you would meet potential friends who you could have more meaningful conversations with. (Emote: smile) I'm sorry if I haven't been of much help and I apologise for so many questions. (Emote: rolleyes) (Emote: smile) Take Care. |
#8
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
Yes, it's definitely depression, I've had it a couple of times in my life, a few years and about 6 weeks ago. I started on Cipralex after feeling absolutely at my lowest ebb 6 weeks ago and I do feel quite a bit better already but medication alone is not going to solve my problems, I need CBT as well so I reccomend you ask your GP to be referred for CBT (if like me you feel unable to ask him/her in person, write it down in a letter and show him/her, that's what I did).
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#9
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
infamy141, ditto what the others have said; I'm in a similar situation and recognise a lot of what you say.
Quote:
Another weird thing to add to the mix, though, is that something that didn't work for you in the past, can work later in life. I was severely depressed from late teens to ~30, and in that time tried most of the SSRIs, an MAOI and a tricyclic with no success. Somekinda major change occurred in me around 31 and now the 3 SSRIs I've used again since have all worked to improve my mood and reduce anxiety. [But not effexor/venlafexane (sp?) for some reason.] Prozac is reckoned to be particularly good for raising mental energy levels so might be worth (another?) try first. I've also found that a holiday away from the familiar misery can sometimes help, though of course, anxiety permitting. all the very best |
#10
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
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#11
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
weird why does the last reply say blank and it by a guest written in 1970?
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#12
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
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#13
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Re: Ive lost interest in everything
Wow, you described my life almost perfectly (reference to first post), if you'd just left out the part about having a job i'd say we're identical. I've felt like this since i was about 24, i'm coming up to 27 now. I'm lucky enough to have another, even more serious health problem than S A, so i cannot take any of the medications normally prescribed for anxiety/depression.
Absolutely nothing interests me.. i passed my driving test, didn't care. Got my first car, wasn't interested. Started a new relationship, felt exactly the same. These were all things I did years ago, i've now pretty much given up hope of finding something i enjoy, nothing enjoyable has happened to me in the past two years. I take up hobbies in the hope that i'll take interest and begin to have something to wake up for, but like yourself, i cannot seem to enjoy anything. If i try to talk to girls online i get bored before the conversation even starts; i know full well they'll hate me. I bought a brand new car, thinking it would add some element of hapiness into my life (seems to cheer most people up), and even moved house, thinking that perhaps a change of scenery might help; it didn't make a single bit of difference. In fact, I felt worse, knowing that even after taking such big steps, i still feel just as crap. I think what we're lacking is 'hope'. Hope that things will some day all suddenly come together and we'll be happy. I even toyed with the idea of trying to convince myself to believe in an organised religion, just to add an element of hope into my life. Gave up with that pretty quickly. Such is life i suppose. I can't really see what I can do other than just sit here and 'hope' something happens. I've tried everything else i can think of. No offence to anyone who replies, but telling me "sitting there waiting for something to happen isn't going to help, you need to get out there and get a life": will just make me feel further alienated and more depressed. God i'm such a winner |