Have you ever intentionally ignored or avoided someone then felt guilty as hell after

[dave81uk]

I do this regularly and never learn because I feel like shit after it and beat myself up the rest of the day.

So basically in Tesco this morning, and coming towards me was someone I think I recognise but wasn’t 100%, so I did my usual look down walk on pretend I didn’t see her. If she speaks to me great I’ll act all surprised, I might have got away with it if my Mrs didn’t say “Hi” to her confirming that it was indeed the person I thought it might be while also making me looking like a stuck up Cnut, basically she would be my cousins daughter, I don’t speak to my cousin in fact I’ve more or less cut myself off from all my family but was at a family funeral few weeks back and my mother was talking to her and I seen them point over at me, my mother being the biggest gobshite/extrovert in the country so she knew me, I kinda thought it was her. The fact she’s blonde/attractive also didn’t help my anxiety, I don’t do well with attractive women. So yeah feeling like a dick now.

Anyone else do this and regret it?

[Dougella]

Yes.

Although in the situation you describe what you did seems totally fine. You weren't sure whether you recognised the person so you just got on with what you were doing until your partner did recognise them and speak to them. You weren't deliberately rude or anything.

[biscuits]

I've avoided people on purpose a million times and always felt relief after haha. Honestly, I feel like I'm doing them a favour from having to have a stilted and awkward conversation with me and who knows if I'm in an over sharing mood where they wouldn't want to know what I'm harping on about.

Nine times out of ten it's a win-win scenario for all involved parties!

Although if it's head on and they've clocked me first then I wouldn't dive into the freezer. If it's someone despicable then I'd have no problem snubbing them to their face.

If it's something that makes you feel bad then maybe one day you might like to challenge that by committing to a smile. I often find people don't always want to stop and chat and a "hello, y'alright" is sufficient. The people who do are usually conversation leaders and do the work.

I think because you're not talking to that side of your family then it's okay that you didn't stop to chat and it would have put her in an awkward position.

[dave81uk]

Originally Posted by biscuits

I've avoided people on purpose a million times and always felt relief after haha. Honestly, I feel like I'm doing them a favour from having to have a stilted and awkward conversation with me and who knows if I'm in an over sharing mood where they wouldn't want to know what I'm harping on about.

Nine times out of ten it's a win-win scenario for all involved parties!

Although if it's head on and they've clocked me first then I wouldn't dive into the freezer. If it's someone despicable then I'd have no problem snubbing them to their face.

If it's something that makes you feel bad then maybe one day you might like to challenge that by committing to a smile. I often find people don't always want to stop and chat and a "hello, y'alright" is sufficient. The people who do are usually conversation leaders and do the work.

I think because you're not talking to that side of your family then it's okay that you didn't stop to chat and it would have put her in an awkward position.

Good point, the conversation starters usually do the work, I know the girl in question is shy too, probably waiting on me to do the work lol she’ll be waiting a while, I was to busy crapping myself

[dave81uk]

Originally Posted by Dougella

Yes.

Although in the situation you describe what you did seems totally fine. You weren't sure whether you recognised the person so you just got on with what you were doing until your partner did recognise them and speak to them. You weren't deliberately rude or anything.

Yeah true I guess. She probably thinks I was though. Ah well fcuk it

[sophie79]

I think pretending you haven't seen each other is ingrained in British society. I know I've done it lots of times and probably to someone else's relief.

[Azalea]

Yes Sophie, the mutual ignore is quite common

[Chess&Junkfood]

It depends on the situation. If they clock me first, or a hello is heading my way, then I usually won't walk on my merry way. What with being so polite and courteous. Which I feel is ingrained in me! I can even imagine shooting out of my Mum and still finding the time to thank the Doctor for delivering me. As well as giving that doctor a firm handshake. It's just who I am. That being said, if they don't clock me first, then I'm skedaddling out of there!

""If you see me walking down the street"

(Where I've ignored a few people from my school days, a former work colleague and my neighbours pet poodle. Although not intentionally)

"Walk on by, walk on by"

Edit:

Im sorry Dave, I forgot to add that I wouldn't be so hard on yourself! After all, having SA can feel like a battle sometimes. All you can do is try your best and keep moving forward the best you can. Even if that means unintentionally moving forward past someone sometimes