Sensory Overload?

[scarlet_diva]

Well I went to the Erotica thing, and OK didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I would, but really forced myself to go because I like everything there, the stalls, the show, etc.

Anyway, by the time I got home i was wiped out, completely and utterly, in a shell-shocked, zombie-like state, I could hardly utter a word, had to cancel the evening out, and all I could do was sit on my sofa in a coma all evening. My friend, however, was slightly tired but absolutely fine.

I was quite disappointed in myself cos it kind of put a downer on the whole event. Even throughout the event itself, I kept having to take little breaks just to sit down and sort of collect myself, so we kept getting coffees and sitting in a sheltered bit where there were fewer people sitting at the tables.

I felt like all my senses had been hyperstimulated past the point that I could bear - the noise, the people, the music - and I could hardly function after a few hours of that. :sadyellow

I also get this if I spend a day out shopping; the other person will be fine, but I'll be wiped out, but really to the point of utter mental and physical exhaustion. I just feel like a weakling little drip every time this happens. It's like I can never be utterly comfortable around other people, which exhausts the hell out of me . Does anyone else get this?

[OldBailey]

I can definitely relate to this. I get knackered after a couple of hours shopping.

I don't think it makes you a 'weakling little drip'; you're having to deal with more stress than your friend so naturally you're going to be more tired.

It might be worth you checking out The Highly Sensitive Person if you haven't before.

[LucyLou]

Yes definatley scarlet!. I find almost everything that i do outside of my home extremely draining. Especially if it involves any social contact. Its hard work this anxiety lark! Be kind to youself and give youself the rest that you deserve and dont feel guilty about it!

[Grah08]

maybe too much coffee could have had an effect.

[custardcreams]

me too scarlet, i remember being out somewhere crowded with my gran once and i needed more coffee breaks than she did well done for going tho, hope you managed to enjoy some of it...

Originally Posted by scarlet_diva

I felt like all my senses had been hyperstimulated past the point that I could bear - the noise, the people, the music - and I could hardly function after a few hours of that. :sadyellow

I also get this if I spend a day out shopping; the other person will be fine, but I'll be wiped out, but really to the point of utter mental and physical exhaustion. I just feel like a weakling little drip every time this happens. It's like I can never be utterly comfortable around other people, which exhausts the hell out of me . Does anyone else get this?

Yes, absolutely! I find it completely mentally exhausting to do anything like that, and it drains all the energy out of me. It's very hard work trying to keep your composure and dealing with all the stimulation etc.
Also if I'm in a room with several people all talking together it does my head in as I percieve it as a kind of choas and my brain just kind of shuts down.

Being in public, like shopping for any length of time makes me feel totally drained too.
I need a quiet rest after such things and it sometimes takes a couple of days to recover.

[moon_dreamer]

I totally agree with that, situations like shopping really take it out of me, I had never really thought why before, but thinking about it, i'm sure thats the reason why, sensory overload

[hobo_girl]

I used to get panic attacks not during but after shopping, kinda like an overloading of the senses emerging after the event, in a panic attack. Hasnt happened to me in a while but it was strange when it did....

[scarlet_diva]

Thanks lots for the replies, guys, it's good to hear I'm not the only one. I kind of wonder if I'm from another planet sometimes and different to everyone else or just really weak and intolerant of life in general ... thanks for the tip on the book, OldBailey. I can definitely identify with the description of a Highly Sensitive Person. It's a very limiting condition, which is v. frustrating. What I wonder is, how the heck can something like CBT tackle something like this, because it's almost something physical, it's hard to explain. Anyway, glad to know people can empathise

[ßazzaOld]

Yeh, Everyone can get warn out from stress doing stuff but for us its little bit more so ofcourse we ganna take more of a pounding. Depending whatever your doing can be good to have short brake after or even a few days after to just level out to your normal self again. Even things dont involve going out like.. phonecalls can be exstremely draining for me. If dont take more time to care for ya self then only going to make it worse next time or even end up trying to avoid it.

[jontyboyoh]

Definitely agree with the recommendation of 'The Highly Sensitive Person'..... I've started reading it myself and would have mentioned it if the other person hadn't [sorry I forgot your name].....

The book's all about overarrousal and how sensitive people can learn to reach an optimal level of arrousal, so they don't go through either bouts of cutting themselves off OR trying to do too much.......

'Tis a good book and could well complement my therapy!

[OldBailey]

Originally Posted by scarlet_diva

What I wonder is, how the heck can something like CBT tackle something like this, because it's almost something physical, it's hard to explain.

Anxiety is very energy sapping so anything that reduces your anxiety will give you more energy for the enjoyable things you want to do. I think the most valuable thing to do is to expose yourself to situations as often as you can manage. The more you do something the more routine it gets and, therefore, the less stressful it is. Easier said than done, though.

[Hoople]

I can totally empathise as I get drained all the time, usually by people, but places and busy areas drain me too. I can go to quite a level of depression just from being overstimulated .

[bb]

I get this quite a lot. During most social situations I find I can bluster my way through it somehow, but when it's all over I have nothing left in the tank, mentally or physically. I've had a really busy weekend (and made the most of it as I don't know when the opportunities will come again) but it probably wasn't the wisest approach. The thought of having to do a whole week of work when I haven't had a minute's peace since Thursday night is horrifying. Even on my own I find the overload is the same now when I try to do more than one thing at a time (yes, I know men can't multi-task anyway.....), I genuinely find it a bit bewildering at times.

[scarlet_diva]

Thanks again for the replies and support - right now I'm thinking: Thank God I'm not the only one who's got this weird thing going on. And Custard, yeah that remark made me laugh because at times I feel like I have less energy than an OAP myself, like when my parents come over to visit, & they'll be will be whizzing around Oxford St. with me following behind like a wet rag, thinking I'm about to pass out cos it's all 'too much'. That frustrates the hell out of me.

What puzzles me though, and what I think is hard to tackle with CBT, is that I get this problem even in situations which I normally enjoy and I don't consider anxiety-provoking.

For example, spending the day shopping can be quite fun (obviously if I'm with someone, otherwise, forget it); also, another example, I love going to Speakers Corner in Hyde Park; even though it's full of crowds it's a good laugh & as long as I'm with someone, I feel 'safe'. So basically it seems to me that it's not so much an anxiety thing but the fact that there's so much going on at the same time - noise, people, movement, etc. Or perhaps I'm anxious without actually realising it?

Anyway with regards to the Highly Sensitive Person book, I bought it a long while back but only read a little bit (my attention span is sometimes atrocious), but i've dug it out and think I'll give it another go.

This bit I found quite good advice and similar to what cj0hn0 was saying: Praise yourself for taking risks and learning something new rather than for your successes; it will help you cope with failure.

I should remember that, since I've been down on myself all weekend thinking I'm a 'weakling drip', thus making myself even more miserable, and deciding not to go to the cinema today after all - which is sh*te. Ah well.

[well_guy]

Yup I have the same problem; but I’v noticed drinking a lucazade or something like that can boost your energy ha-ha. But really It’s because SA folk are so aware of their surroundings and perception of other peoples behavior; this is alot of data for your brain to process. Which results in fatigue or sometimes emotional breakdowns.

[pboy]

I can relate to this aswell, recently I have been feeling very drained and tired as I have had to deal with a lot of situations, things like shopping drain me, I come home needing to lie down on my bed. I think it's probbaly normal for us SAers.

[Zayed]

Originally Posted by scarlet_diva

For example, spending the day shopping can be quite fun (obviously if I'm with someone, otherwise, forget it); also, another example, I love going to Speakers Corner in Hyde Park; even though it's full of crowds it's a good laugh & as long as I'm with someone, I feel 'safe'. So basically it seems to me that it's not so much an anxiety thing but the fact that there's so much going on at the same time - noise, people, movement, etc. Or perhaps I'm anxious without actually realising it?

Hmm it’s interesting what you said Scarlet about feeling safe going shopping etc with someone else. Personally, I find it draining to be with someone at these times (unless they are incredibly close, but even then….). If I shop solo I seem to have an incredible amount of energy - noise and people 'in general' as long as I don't have to engage in conversation with them for very long, doesn’t tire me at all.

I think it’s because, when I’m on my own, I don’t feel ‘responsible’ for anyone else’s happiness. I always feel that I should be ‘entertaining’ people and making sure that they are having the best time ever - even going shopping, which is so stupid, I don’t know why I feel like this. Weird.

[hobo_girl]

me too, i often feel pressure to be entertaining when out shopping which is why i prefer to shop on my own usually.

[scarlet_diva]

Originally Posted by Zayed

I think it’s because, when I’m on my own, I don’t feel ‘responsible’ for anyone else’s happiness. I always feel that I should be ‘entertaining’ people and making sure that they are having the best time ever - even going shopping, which is so stupid, I don’t know why I feel like this. Weird.

Yeah, Zayed, I'm with you on that one - I forgot to mention that my chaperone (ha) needs to be someone I know extremely well - at this moment in time only my ex really; otherwise I'd be the same as you, and feel the need to keep up a constant chatter or feel responsible that they were having a good time.
Since we're now pretty much best friends & have the same interests we have no probs with that; we can babble on about total rubbish or be silent & it's all cool. Most importantly, he provides a sort of 'buffer zone' between me and other people, which I desperately need if I'm out in public, since I get so paranoid & self-conscious amongst people I don't know.

[Sara B]

Originally Posted by hobo_girl

me too, i often feel pressure to be entertaining when out shopping which is why i prefer to shop on my own usually.

Yeah, I can relate to that one too... I don't think I'm quite as bad as I used to be for feeling I need to be entertaining tho' - but I definatley still find myself feeling that at times. Yeah, I find it tiring and draining as often I haven't felt able to relax.