Type What You're Thinking About Right Now (5)

[Saponara_Immobile]

Mod Team Edit: Continuation of discussion started here: http://www.social-anxiety-community....ad.php?t=66242



thought there was a choir outside but it's just next door's telly.

[trackred12]

really shoulfnt have drunk so much, need yo choll out

[Ermm... Yeh?]

Just shows how sick this society is when people tell me I'm looking well and healthy just because I've lost some weight. Ignore the dark abyssal voids undet my eyes. I'm probably more 'unhealthy' now than I've ever been bar a few occassions but nice to know that people are so easily fooled.

Turns out that my mother's side of the family have pretty much given up with me. Two cards, £10 and and Easter egg (turns out I did get one this Easter woop woop), and my mother pretty much threatening to stop sending birthday cards with money, etc. , unless I get in contact with her, meanwhile casually ignoring the money she stole from me which in all honesty she's probably forgot about. Not that I'm a money grabbing bastard, it's just extra money would do wonders for me right now, and with my family it is being usef as a sign of how much they give a s**t about me. Was hoping for more, but at least it's bought me some tobacco.

Spent the night talking with my father and a friend through him, and it's just so clear to see he doesn't realise how much he screwed up my life. He's all too willing to blame my mother even acting 'humble' saying he would have got me out of there sooner had he known hiw bad it was, completely ignoring how bad he was to me in the 5 years I lived with him. It was hell but he just thinks that he is reasonable and treated me fairly, when the reality is he treated me like s**t, made completely unreasonable expectations for me to continually fail to live up to and utilised the same aggressive psycho/emotional blackmail environment that I was meant to have escaped.

Arghh!! It annoys me sooooooooo much that he thinks he is reasonable when it's all so clearly a facade. One day I swear I'll put him in his place, whenI can overcome the SA since noone he knows would believe me.

Now for some sleep.

[Omar Little]

Why do they make bus and train timetables so hard to understand? My head bleeds on the inside just to look at them, I begin to think they were designed to be deliberately obscure just to dissuade me from leaving this poxy town; but why is it crucial to them that i stay here, what diabolical reason is there behind it all?

[buttonlane]

Originally Posted by Samba

Guess I'm having one of my ugly days where I look like some alien freak. My head seems to be shaped like a light bulb.

^

Im the opposite right now, feeling rather pleased with my reflection. (first time in my adult life)
Makes a refreshing change from seeing myself as Pathetic, hideous, ret**ded looking cretin.

Thats Afformations for ya..

[buttonlane]

^ I said already.

Afformations. (not to be confused with affirmations)

[maro111]

Originally Posted by buttonlane

^

Im the opposite right now, feeling rather pleased with my reflection. (first time in my adult life)
Makes a refreshing change from seeing myself as Pathetic, hideous, ret**ded looking cretin.

That Afformations for ya..

Good for you Buttonlane. That is a massive step and hugely important.

[maro111]

Originally Posted by buttonlane

^ I said already.

Afformations. (not to be confused with affirmations)

Although your lipstick looks a bit smeared in your pic, might want to sort that out

[hellotiger]

I'm wondering if I can get a ban on facebook too. I could deactivate it but they make it so easy to reactivate.

[maro111]

Originally Posted by Leonard_Egan

sorry you're having such a rough time. I know how that feels very well. Look after yourself and give yourself some time. There's no rush to get back on your A-game. Good luck.



Ha, no it's not a fitting end for me. I'm thinking death by sword.....but in my town possession of swords is kinda frowned on. Saying all that.....it was a really nice pen....elegant. I doubt that would be mentioned though by the doctors when they tell my family. Glad you're still good. Really happy the tablets are working out for you. We are lucky to live in todays world with all this help available. Baby steps Mark. You'll get where you need to be at some point. Well done

Thanks. I guess its the frustration which is the killer. All we ever need is a bit of hope!

Hmm might have to meet in the middle somewhere and say it was a penknife ..does sound a nice pen though!!.

Hope your having a good day!

[Leonard_Egan]

^Ha, yeah a penknife could work. Yeah, frustration can be a punch to the gut. Staying active and hopeful is the way to go. Hope you're having a good day too Mark.

[hellotiger]

[Amelia Rosae]

Oh god it's happening all over again... MMO binges... IT'S DRAGGING ME INTO A VOID OF GRINDING.

I'm trying out Tera online because I can't help myself anymore. 90% ¬_¬

[MLP James]

I can't stop thinking about the legend that is Barry Burton, best video game character ever? I think so.

[buttonlane]

Halling my ass to the gym. *gulps*

[azura]

Why have I ordered salad stuff this week, on my online shopping? I hate salad. My good intentions will dwindle and it will all decay, in the fridge - whilst I eat crisps and chocolate.

[Polygon]

Wondering what I can put on my face to stop it stinging

[Scrobes]

Originally Posted by Amelia Rosae

Oh god it's happening all over again... MMO binges... IT'S DRAGGING ME INTO A VOID OF GRINDING.

I'm trying out Tera online because I can't help myself anymore. 90% ¬_¬

Don't be too horrified. The combat is pretty fun. :>

[maro111]

Originally Posted by Mousey

Wondering what I can put on my face to stop it stinging

[maro111]

Originally Posted by buttonlane

Halling my ass to the gym. *gulps*

I need to push myself a bit more. The one good thing that nervous energy does is keep me slim...just wish my leg would stop twitching

[Amelia Rosae]

Originally Posted by Scrobes

Don't be too horrified. The combat is pretty fun. :>

I'm playing it now, it's such a lovely game. It has SO MUCH DETAIL. Thing is with me I won't stop playing this until I hit the max level now. ¬_¬ Pretty much one of the reasons I don't normally try games out haha.

[maro111]

Originally Posted by Mousey

I've found everything I ever wanted and more. Things like this don't happen to me

Just proves that none of us know whats waiting around the corner!

[Scrobes]

Originally Posted by Mousey

I've found everything I ever wanted and more. Things like this don't happen to me

Very happy for you Mousey.

[Polygon]

^^ Guess not
^ Thanks

[azura]

Originally Posted by Mousey

I've found everything I ever wanted and more. Things like this don't happen to me

You have no idea how much this has made me smile.

[azura]

^You deserve it and I have faith that you'll get it. x

[maro111]

The girl that caused a lot of my breakdown is not going to take up so much room in my head anymore

[Leonard_Egan]

^Good to hear that Maro. Stick with it. Take the power back. It's yours.

[maro111]

Originally Posted by Leonard_Egan

^Good to hear that Maro. Stick with it. Take the power back. It's yours.

Thanks Richard. Hard as hell but the power will be mine!

[Leonard_Egan]

^^It will cost a fair bit. Can't you find the next size up of frame and design a border? I had to do that for my Punch Drunk Love poster. It looks rubbish tbh lol...but maybe you're more arty than me.