Yikes the mists are clearing. I had swung into a deep depression, almost a crisis, and a subtle one, didnt notice its creeping onset, then, suddenly consumed! In the midst of the black smog.

Wow. Yet alongside that, some deeper yearning seeking to express. More healthsome, wholesome. The tendancy towards life. Expansion, openness, connection. By life, not necessarily society, but the essence of life itself, the living breathing intelligence of the natural world.

Somehow...

Enjoyed a few days of buoyant mood and increased sociability. Accepted a spontaneous invite to a friends sauna, took a walk with my house-mates and was even contemplating attending the Bardic finals, which would be something like 10 steps up the ladder of interaction.

Mood crashed today, I overdid it. Cycled to the pool twice in two days, got overwrought from the stimulation of the traffic and the urban environment and I need to factor in half a day off, free from people and roads...

Two small but significant firsts: first barefoot walk of the summer. When the soles of my pink, podgy feet met the cool, fresh morning grass, I can't tell you how good that felt. Rather than yomping up and down I circambulated the Tor with my attention mostly in the sensations of the feet. Really takes one out of the mind and into the present moment, via the body.

We have had rain, the grass was wet rather than dewy damp which felt cleansing and exhilarating. During the walk my feet...

Have recently started a journal on a nutrition blog - nutrition is such a big piece of it - wellness. I've somehow concocted a positive persona over there; the best bits. I'm all bright and breezy over there and narrate my successes, not my wobbly moments.

Members are loving my journal and that version of myself; well it is me! I'm not fantasising. I felt to keep my emotional journey out of it, this time. Cos I've blogged previously on food/eating psychology and attracted a lot of...

Waking up to a very different kind of weather than in recent days. Grey, covered sky, sound of wind, a more muted feel.

That's helpful in some ways, a permission to be quieter. Though the recent sunshine has been a total mood boost.

Yesterday, Saturday I took a longish nature walk with my camera and felt relieved that nature 'spoke' to me. Seeing, feeling? A movement of energy in seemingly static branches. The wonderment of spring growth.

Ferns unfolding...