Today is the start of the history trip. I didn't get any sleep last night because I was so nervous of people catching onto my weirdness (SA). I have to go to Germany by coach, that's not easy. I hate people watching me sleep and eat so I have been under a lot of pressure. I haven't eaten anything but a block of chocolate for a whole day. I can't sleep either.

This question often comes up quite regularly on anxiety forums "What advice would you give your younger self?" Its a hard one. I try not to go for the more pessimistic one of killing myself to stop future pain. Of course this is still dependant of what happens but at the moment to say my future looks bleak is a huge understatement and the last 30 years have been pretty shit as well. This is not depression talking whatever people may say. Lots of life is shit and does get worse. There...

Today was not good. At school i don't like talking to people but today groups of people my age kept on coming up to me and asking me questions about hw and other stuff. That made me sweat like a pig and people started to think that i was a bit weird ( they already think i am weird, this just confirmed it). Then some of them started to enter my personal space so i pushed them away and hid in a classroom. If my school let me i would listen to music all day just so no-one would talk to me and i could...

[B]1. Difficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions[/B]

What? Yes, Where am I? Up shit creek most of the time. My memory is not so good any more. I forget things or care.

[B]2. Fatigue and decreased energy[/B]

Yes, I feel exhausted now and dont go out much. I have become much more avoidant and often dont speak to other people for weeks. I would use SAUK more but I l always feel as comfortable here as Jeremy Corbyn at the friends...

With my job, through an agency, I have been given no work from this week until the 21st August. The agency can give me more work but I decided to take a break. Tbh, most of the jobs are kitchen portering and I hate the jobs, they don't suit me.

During this break I haven't done much, too anxious to go out. I've just been music producing and sound designing on my DAW, it does feel I do it too much but then it feels like I wouldn't learn as much if I didn't.

Work adds...