Emerging after another immersion in the deep labyrinth of self, at an especially potent time. Full moon on the 13th, Friday 13th, the monthly bleed, rising sun-power of solstice (increased light = increased awareness) and a grief anniversary build-up too.

Didnt leave home for three days – mostly didnt leave the bed, which became the holding womb-space. Did you ever see Tracy Emin's piece, where she staged her bed after a weekend of deep experience. Mine was a yogic version lol, spiritual...

More love, more space, less mind.

Lost - by David Wagoner •1976

Stand still. The trees ahead and bushes beside you
Are not lost. Wherever you are is called Here,
And you must treat it as a powerful stranger,
Must ask permission to know it and be known.

The forest breathes. Listen. It answers,
I have made this place around you.
If you leave it, you may come back again, saying Here.

No two trees are the...

Sunday I could barely move all day. All the excitement, overstimulation and emotional drama of the week, well it corpsed me and I surrendered. There's a difference between deciding to take a rest day as prevention/maintenance and having a day of enforced shut-down that I don't have control over.

Thankfully I didnt mentally resist, in the past, such episodes trigger mind-fear and alarm, what if I'm broken and can't recover my energy? What did I (or anyone else) do wrong to cause this...

I lost myself again. I can only make that comment when I recognise the lostness, usually that means I am on the journey home.

Shall I describe the circumstances that led to the separation? Somehow that doesnt feel relevant. They are floating, causal factors, that's all. It can be this, or that; he said, she said, I went here, I went there.

The basic equation is - overstimulation + too much activity/people =get tired and over stressed. Feel tired and low. Try to fix...

Spent four days, hunkered down at home, a mini-menstrual retreat. Allowing myself to stop and withdraw from the world, simply 'cos that's what I feel to do; and while my mind was a little bothered by it, my body is clear on this point. No energy. The requirements are clear : food and rest in large amounts.

Had a tech-free Saturday; felt good to re-occupy myself; I tend to drift further and further from presence the more time I spend online.

The weather has been moody,...