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coping with having children (and SA)

Posted 19th January 2012 at 04:45 by mhealer3

Originally Posted by ____
Having a kid would make me a better person and give me the motivation to live. Just need to get over my fear of relationships
i agree with that. i was never any good at dating,
& i never expected to get married.
but being a 'couple' really made me want to do my best 4 my mate.
as a mom, i aspired 2 be great. better than anyone ever expected of me.
(my family had let me know they didn't...
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i like my online 'friends'...

Posted 19th January 2012 at 01:57 by mhealer3

isn't it nice meeting people without the pressure of face-2-face?
i like it because we r all here to exchange ideas & offer opinions.
we come voluntarily.
we are strangers,
but yet have very much in common.
we can interact fearlessly here, & politely.
i think there's so much less JUDGEMENT in this type of exchange.
no yelling,or arguing like can happen in person.
i dare 2 say that this type of commonality is what the best...
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what happens after divorce.

Posted 15th January 2012 at 04:14 by mhealer3

dear r____,
thanks for the message & hope you stay strong during your separation.
my divorce was like being torn apart.
at first i didn't notice it, because i was kinda numb.
but after the numb wears off, there's a lot
of crud underneath that hits u like a truck.
i've heard that many start drinking at that time, & i don't blame them.
i tried it, but it's just not my thing.

but when the panic hit me: ('i...
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still here...

Posted 14th January 2012 at 16:55 by mhealer3

still waiting 4 something outrageously good to happen
i lost my little job, but those people were mean anyway.

i have to keep believing for something terrific coming or i couldn't go on.

in the meantime, i count my smaller blessings, &
go about whatever i can find to do...

like--i started volunteering a little (with the elderly homebound in my community). we bring them a hot lunch. i only volunteer once per week...
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A dug ditch.

Posted 10th January 2012 at 18:43 by Matt_1983
Updated 10th January 2012 at 18:47 by Matt_1983 (dcdcd)

I search for an answer, words pop up and pass through my brain, assesed for worthiness, rejected again. I panic slightly as the seconds tick and my mouth remains shut and my dry fake smile wobbles. My lovely work colleague Paul, stood by my side all smiles and inoccent chat, awaits a response to his story about the ditch he dug at the weekend, in the path behind his shed. I scream inside my head and beg for words, any words, to drop from my lazy lips and pop the sense of awkwardness that builds...
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