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Haunted by the Past

Posted 2nd June 2015 at 13:04 by indigo777

I know they say you should not dwell on the past especially if you have nothing but bad memories. However there are just so many small but painful events that are still there, that have shaped my life and affected my confidence at every level. I remember starting at work as a young man. Despite being in the top 10% of my school I left college after only 2 days after an SA panic attack during Maths. Sitting alone in yet another class and feeling like a freak was too much. So after long term unemployment...
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Old

It feels like the answer is getting a bit clearer, I can vision overcoming SA

Posted 21st May 2015 at 21:58 by Alone.

Idk if I am crazy for feeling that it is very possible to overcome SA. Recently, the three main things I have been doing in my life are working, morning jogs (it's only the Couch to 5k though) and going to the SA Support Groups.

I have found that jogging gets rid of Brain Fog, which gives me some confidence and gets rid of some anxiety. The fact that I'm liking jogging and how it makes makes me feel like doing more exercise and being healthy.

However I wouldn't say...
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Old

I cry until I laugh

Posted 10th May 2015 at 13:21 by indigo777

My anxiety appears to go in cycles at the moment. I may have a few weeks of relative normality but then it gets quite out of control and I have periods of anxiety lasting weeks where it totally overwhelms me. I donít think its depression in the same way as any clinical depression as I can still operate daily tasks. However any small modicum of enjoyment gets sucked right out of me so I feel deeply miserable and unhappy. Its definitely the worst anxiety I have experienced in my lifetime. I feel completely...
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Old

Work and Identity

Posted 1st May 2015 at 07:36 by Alone.

Yesterday the colleague that I bond with went on a holiday. As soon as he left the office, one of my bosses friends/gym buddies came to the office, apparently he is helping us out with work part time now. He invited one colleague to start coming to the gym with him. I have been invited to go gym with the boss before but refused. I'm not anti gym, although I don't want to be going to the gym at the moment. I mainly refused cause I like my own free time, I already work 40 hours a week with him so...
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Old

It's all about the way you carry yourself

Posted 26th April 2015 at 14:36 by Alone.

I was told off for the way I carried myself in the 2/2 Choi Kwang Doi Taster class I attended. The instructor said it makes me an easy target and I should stop looking towards the ground and have my eyes darting around the place and that it makes me an easy target for bullies. While what he said was probably the painful truth I just really think the way he confronted the problem was very wrong. I was offended by his confrontation mainly because I felt that he was blaming me for my poor body language,...
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