It feels like a weight has been lifted off me now that I realise I can't always agree with everyone realistically and that I'm alright. I don't know if this is just a happy phase though.

Today at work their was a new person doing work trail. So far I like the guy. This guy has been asking the boss for the job for a few months though. Even if this job doesn't work out for him, I respect the guy for his determination.

The guy told me he doesn't see me much, when he found...

Earlier this week I felt bad about going to my job and felt like quitting, especially as my boss had offered me an apprenticeship when I wasn't really interested in the job.

Towards the end of the week however, I had a change of attitude towards my job. I think it's because I began to realise that it wasn't by force that I had to like my job and that it's pretty normal to start off with a job you don't like. I know this sounds like common sense lol. I have to search for what I want...

I have known for a long time that I don't share some of the "common interests" that my peers seem to share. I think this has partly contributed to my anxiety as I thought that my lack of knowledge in certain aspects of popular/media culture was something to hide out of shame. I have recently been a bit more open about the fact I haven't watched some films or sports that a "typical" 20 year old would have. I've never watched Matrix or Wrestling.

Yesterday an 18...

Today, as it was Bank holiday I got a day off work. Despite not really liking the current job I do that much, I admit that most weekends I actually feel worse. Despite feeling drained after work, I do feel a sense of satisfaction that I haven't just wasted my day away and also feel like I deserve to be able to relax after a day of work.

I put the cause of my depressing weekends to the fact that I have a lack of structure on weekends when I'm not working. Not doing much apart from...

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Often I don't really mind a rainy day as it makes me feel better about doing nothing. However as today is the last public holiday before Christmas and is the last day of the city festival i had intended to go out and photograph things. It helps, doing things and occupying time helps to push the feelings of doubt and pain and unrelenting restlessness off of my back for a...