Not as much as I used to hate myself - sometimes when the demons are doing their best I hate the effort it takes to stay one step ahead - I definitely hate the fact that I got to this place all by myself - by that I mean that I was my own bully - of course the reverse is true and I can get to a healthier and happier place by myself by my own efforts - on the good days that seems so doable and really now there are more good days than bad.
