Invent a quote

[Mr. Nobody]

That'll be £380 mate,.... I can come around next Tuesday to start it.

[Tubbs]

"See me in mi pants and ting!" - Mahatma Gandhi

[Mr. Nobody]

^

[Consolida]

If anyone laughs at my loin cloth I shall thrash him with my stick

- Mahatma Gandhi

[Mr. Nobody]

The death of Winter will be the death of man,
So suffer ye the pain of showers and the dearth of light,
Lest ye say farewell to the light for all of time,
And gnash your teeth thinking,
"Why didn't I just hit the Xbox?"

Obe-1- can o' beans

[Mr. Nobody]

"go on now, go,
walk out the door,
just turn around now,
'cause your not welcome any more"

Joe Biden, Nov 2020

[Mr. Nobody]

Many there be, who writeth lines of text,
Formulating and copulating in the minds of man,
Inspiring or conspiring to deliver meaning,
But, verily confusing and bemusing most,
Tilting markets and slating great deeds,

Thus I give you, the twittering and bickering,
From the large ego, to the small,
Just give us £44 billion and you can have it all,

Jack Dorsey 1973 ~ 4:44pm

[Mr. Nobody]

If you want to survive a hurricane,
GET VACCINATED!

Joe Biden 1896 - last week.

[biscuits]

He who farts last,
farts furthest.

Anon.

[Mr. Nobody]

Verily sir, I sayeth unto thee,
When I have thus, from Lidl bought,
Thine 24p beans, and thy £1 sausigee
Do not, please sir, sit nexteth to thee,
Or sayeth unto the crowd,
"What is yonder noise, or untold smell?"
"I seem to have wandered into a fresh new hell"

For it is in thy midst, this credit crunch,
And what thoust can affordeth for thine lunch,
Thine 24p beans and £1 sausage,
Well fried, and buttered, with not-butter, cannot beleiveth.

I've lost my companions, now, since having my chow,
And my pants are due renewed, for things imbued,
The gravy and the tar, let slip, arse ajar,..

Come back waitrose, thou do'eth say,
Thine can have my pennies this very day,

For tis merrily I say to thee,
When I buy from you,
I stay wind-free.

Anon.

[Nanuq]

^

Tarry at your duty and afore long the world will smell of bin juice

[Mr. Nobody]

You're never alone, with a bag of Haribo.

J. Saville.

[Mr. Nobody]

"No-one gets out of here alive"

Bernard Mathews

[booplebum]

🐧 Penguins may like the cold, but you'll never find a happy penguin in the freezer!

[cymruambyth26]

'The convenient truth shall set you free!'

Donald J Trump.

[Mr. Nobody]

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Come on over to my place
Hey, you, (hey you) we're having a party
We'll be swinging, dancing and singing
Oh, boy, won't you come on over tonight"

Michael Barrymore

[anxiouslondoner]

"What I do is art. There's no other word for it.
I made that show. It's success is down to my hard work and talent. Nothing else.
But it's always the bearded guy who takes the credit. All he does is lower the tone."

-- Mr Blobby

[Existential Jam]

"If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach a man to go down on a woman, he will taste fish for the rest of his life"

- John West

[anxiouslondoner]

Never interrupt your enemy when he's taking a sh!t.
- Sun Pu, The Shart of War

[Appear]

'Shantay, you stay'

- RuPaul, making a decision on his mother's DNR

[Appear]

'All of us are in the gutter, but some of us are looking up skirts.'

- Oscar Wilde

[Appear]

'People always underestimate me. But last night I managed to fit four boiled eggs in my mouth. You look like you'd choke on two.'

- Kate Middleton

[Appear]

'I do have nickname for my husband. I call him Schrödinger's President.'

- Jill Biden