|
|
#1
8th June 2012, 12:37
|
|||
|
|||
My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
They just came home. My mum had a breast screening recently and was called back. Today she was diagnosed. As soon as they came in I knew. My mum was silent. It looks like she's been crying. I saw a green booklet on the table, with the breast cancer ribbon on.
I just asked my dad and he says she's having an operation. It's small, and caught early. I'm numb and in shock. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to think. My dad is so calm. I thought my heart would speed up to 170 but nothing yet. I just can't believe it. I just can't. I'm sorry, I didn't know where to put this. Oh god I feel sick. Is she going to die? Will I get cancer? As it is genetic? I'm scared to die. I can't handle this. I can't. Am I selfish? I just don't know what to do. Why has this happened. Why is there no cure. Why is cancer so F-CKING common now??? Wasn't it once so rare?? I just don't know. I'm sorry. 
|
|
#3
8th June 2012, 12:48
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Sorry about your mum it must be very scary for you and your family. Breast cancer is one of the most common forms of cancer about 1 in 8 women have it at some point. That they have caught it this early and it is a very minor operation is really positive news.
This is a little bit about if breast cancer is hereditary http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Cancerin...es/Breast.aspx It says in that that only 5-10% of cases are thought to be inherited which is very low.
|
|
#4
8th June 2012, 12:57
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
 , its awful news ino how it feels, ^thats very true if its small an caught early then it more than likely can be dealt with, ino ur hurtin right now but u gotta stay strong for ur mum ino its very hard tho, pm me if u need someone to talk to x
|
|
#5
8th June 2012, 13:22
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Thank you. I just feel that the universe has f-cked me about. I don't really talk about it here, but I have a severe phobia of death. I've told a couple of people, but I've always been... ashamed, embarrassed to really talk about it. Or maybe I'm so afraid of the subject I can't talk about it. But I think about it quite a lot. I have no faith. I cannot say I truly, wholeheartedly believe in God. I struggle to believe in an afterlife. Deep, deep down I think I'm quite spiritual and believe in... something... in the universe we cannot see, some forces, energy or something. I'd love to believe that we do have souls which are energy that cannot be destroyed. But it's so hard. I used to wish on stars years ago until I realised they weren't listening. I believe in jinxes. I believe in Sod's Law. The universe is shit. This is so f-cking typical isn't it? My mum has cancer. It might be nthing to worry about, I don't really know. All I can think of is... oh god I'm not strong enough. I'm not.
|
|
#6
8th June 2012, 13:45
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Sorry to here this.
I know a woman who had breast cancer over 20 years ago and she's still going strong, it never came back anywhere. 
|
|
#7
8th June 2012, 13:50
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Once your mum is feeling up to it try having a talk with her, it will help a lot. She will have already discussed with her doctor what will happen in the operation and all the technical details like that. Having a better understanding of it will likely help you because you won't be predicting the worst.
|
|
#10
8th June 2012, 15:31
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Thank you all. She is signing some consent forms on Tuesday, and her operation will be within the next four weeks. Possibly waiting four weeks seems like such a long time...
CornflakeGirl, I'm sorry about your friend. You must have been very worried, too, hope you're all right
|
|
#11
8th June 2012, 15:54
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Just re-interate what everyone else says and also the fact that they caught it quick is a positive sign. Woman at work contracted stomach cancer last yr and they got it fast and it was treated fast also and she's back at work and fine now.
|
|
#12
8th June 2012, 16:16
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
eek
 sorry to hear that! ..makes all my ramblings to you seem quite petty now hope your doing fine, catching it early is at least 1 good thing i guess!
|
|
#13
8th June 2012, 16:42
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
Nooo... Ha ha, I actually imagined you saying that earlier. I know you wellz! It doesn't at all, I still worry about all the same things, even more really. I might be a while replying to your message BTW  Head's a bit messed up at the mo.
|
|
#14
8th June 2012, 17:02
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
My mother had breast cancer but she was an elderly lady and I realize it could be genetic but I could be knocked down by a car tomorrow. The way I jay walk, that is more probable, unfortunately. All the best, Theo
|
|
#15
8th June 2012, 20:36
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
My dad had prostate cancer a few years ago and it was a similar situation, I won't go on and on but has cancer was also found early and once he had his prostate removed his health has been back to normal. When things are caught early the prospects are very good. Its understandable to have mixed feelings, and you're not selfish. It might help you all to have a "family discussion" where you air out your feelings, or even you might just talk to your parent(s). I hope for the best for you and your family
|
|
#16
8th June 2012, 21:30
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Really sorry to hear this,my thoughts are with you and your mum and whole family
I can`t really say anything else other than what everyone has said about it being really good it was caught early etc.I went through my Dad having cancer and anything major like this is bound to throw up all sorts of feelings and fears,it certainly did for me. Try not to feel bad about any of them and make sure you reach out and ask for support when you need it
|
|
#18
8th June 2012, 22:43
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
sorry to hear your news ,petal. Take heart from the timescale, as they've given her a 4 week window for her operation so it is perhaps not too aggressive. My husband had cancer in 2008, it was frightening & draining, but he did come through it ok. It's not always the BIG "C" people are terrified of, but an illness like any other & your mum will need lots of TLC & you will too xx
|
|
#20
9th June 2012, 01:02
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
|
|
#22
9th June 2012, 14:01
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Sorry to hear that, it's hard to know what to say, my mum is still off sick from a major op which the doctors said they had to do to prevent cancer from possibly developing later on.
Like Tiger said, sit & talk with her. Don't keep it all inside, she'll need your support and you'll need someone like a friend/trusted family member you can talk to as well. There are lots of charities that offer support. At least it has been caught early so they can operate and keep monitoring her routinely after that. Take care x
|
|
#23
9th June 2012, 14:56
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Wow, thank you everyone. I had quite a bad night, restless, lost a few hours sleep, is very nice to come on here and read your lovely replies.
 Hearing these success stories is making me a little more hopeful. I knew it was common now but so many people here going through it, really shows how common it is...  I do tend to think of cancer in a very negative, hopeless way. To the people who's loved ones pulled through - I am glad, you are all much stronger than me I felt very alone but I don't feel quite so alone now. And to the people who lost loved ones I am so sorry. My family does not really 'do' emotion and discussion... we tend to bottle things, hide things, and act as usual. At the moment we are not mentioning it and going through ordinary, everyday life... I don't know if that's normal, but it is what they have chosen. It's nice to know I have people here to talk to if I need.
|
|
#24
9th June 2012, 19:43
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Really sorry to hear about your Mum. Just wanted to say that my boyfriends Mum had early stage breast cancer diagnosed in 1999 and we were both terrified. She had a 4 week wait and then the operation and she has been clear of cancer for the last 13 years so there's every chance your Mum will be ok. Take care, xx
|
|
#25
10th June 2012, 01:55
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
 my mum and my wee sister are doing the moonwalk in Edinburgh just now
|
|
#26
10th June 2012, 18:44
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Hope you, your mother and family are and will be...fine.
|
|
#28
22nd June 2012, 23:31
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
HI Hope your all doing ok. My mum had it 8 years ago, it is a big shock. Try to take each day as it comes, and live your life as much as normal as you can. I went on one of the breast cancer sites, I think it was breast cancer care or something, and went on the forum. Take care x
|
|
#29
23rd June 2012, 01:44
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
I'd just like to add that my Father died from (secondary) liver cancer in April this year.. (Reading that back, it still seems so unreal.) I know it's probably not much comfort to you, but if there is anything I can do for you, you need only ask.
|
|
#30
23rd June 2012, 08:31
|
|||
|
|||
|
Re: My mum just been diagnosed with breast cancer
Quote:
But you know... cancer really isn't the death sentence that it was years ago. I know many people who have had cancer and are still here today. Happy and well. I lost my dad to secondary bone cancer in 1996. It started as prostrate but my dad kept quiet about his symptoms and it spread until it was too late. I will never forget the day he was diagnosed. It was my 26th birthday and I was with him and my mum when he was told. Had he have come forward earlier, it would have been a different story. I understand how you are feeling right now. The shock. The numbness. My mum survived ovarian cancer at 65. Her death last year at 72 was down to complications from immobility while waiting for a hip-op. Nothing to do with cancer. MY aunty got cancer of the bowel in the early 80s and she has managed to outlive alll those in the family of her generation.The owd girl is 93!! I swear she's hanging on to get her telegram from her Maj.  So it isn't game over by a long shot. Although, it's natural to think it on hearing the word at first, given the history of treatment. But it's changed a hell of a lot since then. You need to be strong for your mum. You know how you feel. Imagine how she is feeling. It's her body, her life. There comes a time in your life when you realise that it's your turn to be strong for your parents. To be there for them. To show them a smiling face. I used humour with my dad. I chose to try and make him laugh every day because my mum was falling apart. I did my crying when I got back home. This is where you get to come into your own as a daughter. As confused and angry as you feel, this is not a time to focus on yourself. Sorry if that sounds harsh. I don't mean it to. I know that you are suffering right now. I understand your worry about it being genetic. I am screened once every two years for ovarian cancer because of mum and her sister (my auntie is still alive and well I might add) I once worried but I know that in being screened, should it happen, it will be caught early. I can't do anymore and worrying about what might never happen won't do me any favours. You might be able to be screened if you are at risk. Talk to your GP about it. It gives you peace of mind. Quote:
Everybody is here for you. You be there for your parents. Big hug here for you love 
|
