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#4593
10th May 2016, 21:45
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
I've been on a few nights out lately and while they were fun, the drinking has made me depressed and paranoid about my health although I didn't recognise the cause as being alcohol until recently.
I'm reading a confidence book and will start the CBT worksheets again tomorrow but could really use a friend. 
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#4596
10th May 2016, 21:56
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
^ hope you're okay lady bee
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#4597
10th May 2016, 22:09
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
^^ Be kinder to yourself, b to the squits - lots of us struggle to cope with things at times, and it's okay to (as I'm sure you'd tell anyone else if it was them), so you shouldn't be disappointed in yourself for struggling a bit too. Feel better.
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#4599
10th May 2016, 22:15
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Very tired, still not recovered from Sunday night's about 3 hours of sleep.
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#4600
11th May 2016, 01:35
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Completely broken. Even though I'm still skeptical I feel like I need some help, as in doctors and mental health stuff. Thing is I don't want to have time off work for appointments and such, especially for this kind of thing. I'm just trapped in this bullshit spiral.
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#4601
11th May 2016, 13:56
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
^ I know it's easy for me to say, but I think you should definitely look into getting some help if you're struggling so much. Fitting it in around work might be difficult, but you don't want things to be left to mount up to the point where you can't cope with working at all. You shouldn't have to suffer in silence.
My nerves feel pretty shot at the moment. I forced myself to go into town, and when I was there I didn't feel so bad, even managed to go to a coffee shop by myself (albeit a not very busy one) But heading back home, I felt awful, sick and full of dread, expecting there to be a few of the local drunks/druggies hanging around on my street. I've built it up in my head that there are people on the lookout for me, word having got around that I called the police on one of them, and that it's only a matter of time before someone jumps me. I've started thinking of ways to be more anonymous, like pulling a hood up and staring at the pavement until I'm clear of the local streets. I've pretty much written off using the local shops and takeaways. I feel exactly like I was at school, dreading encountering bullies, and just like then when my solution was to avoid school as much as I could get away with, I feel like staying indoors as much as I can. It's possible that no one knows who I am, or even cares, including the person I called the police about. It's just, there's this bonfire that's been built up in my head, and I'm constantly on edge expecting something to provide the spark that ignites it.
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#4603
11th May 2016, 16:22
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Deflated.
Dads back home and seems agitated and fidgety. I hate sharing living space. Ugh, what a ****ing life this is. If only there was an off button.
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#4604
11th May 2016, 20:01
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Ker-nackered.
Finally found a work out video on you tube that wasn't cheesy, really American or full of motivational talk/crap. Weirdly remembered Cindy Crawford workout from the 90's when I was at school and found 'the next challenge' surprisingly honest, down to earth and pragmatic. (Unlike the awful Davina McCall OTT grinning and patronisation of which I lasted abt 2 mins with). I must look at the 1st one she did as well and see what it's like. Liking the 90's music in the background as well.  Def. need to start doing this regularly.
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#4605
11th May 2016, 23:08
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Finally decided to back up all the photos on my phone so I could free up some space. It's been hard going through all the photos and seeing my Dad. It doesn't help having Bon Iver playing in the background but I'm just feeling really down. Haven't had a good cry like this in a while. I'm not sure if I'm mourning properly, but then again I don't know how one properly mourns a parent.
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#4609
12th May 2016, 06:58
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Quote:
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#4610
12th May 2016, 14:52
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
I'm not doing good atm. Things have been difficult recently and today i really struggled to raise myself 'up' and keep my mask on. I very nearly had a panic attack yesterday - someone dared to have a conversation with me when i was feeling fragile. I'm also struggling with shopping - can't stand the whole till experience, it's horrendous when you're feeling on edge. I may have to start shopping where self-service is an option.
And the days keep coming and coming. I need a break desperately, even though i'm only working part-time, i've been at it continually for over 2yrs with only Sundays and bank holidays off. Thing is, i doubt i'd be able to summon the energy to drag myself back once i take a proper length of time off. I wouldn't know what to do with holiday anyway. I haven't holidayed anywhere for nearly a decade. My passport has expired... ****ing ages ago 
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#4612
12th May 2016, 16:24
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
^^ Ta, Mo
This weather, i think, is the cause of my recent upset. Pollen levels have shot up and it's making me feel groggy and miserable, plus the heat is upon us all of a sudden. Hope you find a little peace today somewhen.
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#4617
12th May 2016, 19:55
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Depressed, yet optimistic at the same time.
On one hand, I feel lonely and rejected due to an unsuccessful date and generally having a non-existent social life (my best friend ditched me about a year ago). On the other hand, I feel like by confronting my social issues, I have had an epiphany of some sort. Joining this forum, having that date, leaving the house, all hopefully the start of achieving some normality.
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#4618
12th May 2016, 20:24
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
Felt a bit crappy earlier. Felt a moment of panic coming on when I was harrassed by two blokes in a shopping centre. Somehow managed to keep my cool and walk away as calmly as I could, though, but I felt sick and my heart was pounding in my chest. I'm trying so hard to live a somewhat normal life and overcome my anxiety, but then things like this happen.
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#4619
12th May 2016, 21:20
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Re: How is everyone feeling? (31)
@Justafriend - sorry to hear you are feeling depressed, hope you are feeling a bit better soon.
It sounds like you are definitely taking some good steps to confront your social issues - things will get easier. @Ryjo - It sounds like you had a horrible experience earlier - hope you feel better soon.
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