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  #1621  
Old 5th July 2022, 22:42
Blackflies Blackflies is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mellie
thanks Consolida, just feel like I stress my partner and family a lot. my partner is so fragile at the moment if I nag him about the mess in his house and all the clutter or something he gets really unwell... I feel like I'm not good for him. I just want to help him but I don't know how to. i won't see him today but I will tomorrow. hug x
He may be dealing with OCD tendencies and can't cope with your well meaning and supportive changes. I'm like this with my mum. Her moving stuff or encouraging me to be more proactive in certain elements of my life really triggers me. I love her just as your partner does you. The snapping or eye rolling isn't a reflection of their love of you but rather at their situation. It's a rut. You can see from a different perspective, they can only see from theirs. Often we know our situation would rapidly change for the better with the subtle or not so subtle changes our significant other wants to impose but we just aren't ready for it. Putting that into words is challenging so we turn on the person who is bringing about this change or lash out emotionally. His house. If you don't share it, try to detach from his home environment. If you can, spend more time outside together even just a walk so the home doesn't become the permanent talking point. Instead of telling him he should clean up, pick up the odd piece of obvious litter and dispose of it, in a way in which he can see. If he doesn't respond, build up to doing this on a regular basis. Small obvious things and build on it. Used a cup, auto go to wash it up without asking and if anything extra is in the sink, just wash it at the same time. Subtle insignificant but consistent change is where it's at.

I am absolutely sure you're not the burden on your family you think you are. Your comment on your partner shows how compassionate and empathetic you are. Often people with these traits are overly hard on themselves when they feel the weight of others on their shoulders given they aren't able to support the people around them as significantly as they'd like. It's okay to not know how or even not to support people as much as we'd like. What's most important is that we have the desire or purity in our heart to want to. That good intention always shines through regardless of the outcome. Some people latch on to trying to help others more so in times of their own difficulty because it helps give a sense of control and stability. It's important to be mindful of not trying to overdo it. Your own mental health matters too.

Quote:
Originally Posted by The*Crafty*Elf
^I'll either be planning for Christmas or planning for funerals, my dear
Nightmare Before Christmas theme sounds splendid for a funeral. I hope your mood brightens up soon. Focus on the good stuff, men candy in leather rockin' around the christmas tree.
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  #1622  
Old 5th July 2022, 23:49
Consolida Consolida is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

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Originally Posted by Moksha
I really hope you stick around crafty elf. I know how you feel. I couldn’t count the number of times I’ve longed to not exist, to dissolve into nothing, etc. And I have felt rage at my parents for bringing me into the world. Weirdly, though, I’m much happier now (at 45) than ever before. On paper I have nothing - no career, no sex life, no partner, virtually no friends. But I’m sort of calm. I’ve given up on ever leading a normal life or being truly happy and fulfilled. I have no hope at all. And because of that I can just enjoy the small things. Chocolate with cold milk, Diet Coke with loads of ice, grilled cheese sandwiches...it’s worth living just to enjoy them!!
That's an inspiring post Moksha. It is often the little things that make life worth living
It's great that you're feeling much more at peace with your life nowadays. It sounds that by letting go of how you think things should be and by accepting them for what they are in the present moment you've become a calmer and more content person
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  #1623  
Old 5th July 2022, 23:52
Dougella Dougella is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

^^ Personally no, I don't. For a start life doesn't owe us anything. But also actually enjoying a few things is a welcome relief to me! After suffering from depression for a very long time just feeling ok sometimes is great, or atleast it feels like it to me anyway.
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  #1624  
Old 7th July 2022, 10:37
Mellie Mellie is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dougella
^^ Personally no, I don't. For a start life doesn't owe us anything. But also actually enjoying a few things is a welcome relief to me! After suffering from depression for a very long time just feeling ok sometimes is great, or atleast it feels like it to me anyway.
Hi dougella pleased to hear you feel ok sometimes, depression sucks have had it for so long now too.
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  #1625  
Old 7th July 2022, 16:57
Dougella Dougella is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

^ Thankyou, it does. I do want people to know it's possible for it to get better though.
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  #1626  
Old 9th July 2022, 09:31
Mellie Mellie is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

I know it's possible just feels like I will always feel like this as felt depressed most of my life but I'm getting private therapy soon and trying to do make myself do a bit more with my life instead of staying in my room constantly! though its tiring keeping up with friends and bf! sorry I shared too much before on here, hope it didn't trigger anyone! x
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  #1627  
Old 17th July 2022, 15:41
Percy Percy is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

Chin up Neverwas
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  #1628  
Old 17th July 2022, 15:59
Moksha Moksha is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

Has anyone heard from Crafty Elf? Is he OK?
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  #1629  
Old 17th July 2022, 20:34
Tembo Tembo is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

Hope you feel better soon NeverWas.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mellie
I know it's possible just feels like I will always feel like this as felt depressed most of my life but I'm getting private therapy soon and trying to do make myself do a bit more with my life instead of staying in my room constantly! though its tiring keeping up with friends and bf! sorry I shared too much before on here, hope it didn't trigger anyone! x
These sound like positive steps Mellie. Good to hear!

Don’t apologise for ‘sharing too much’. It’s good to let off some steam.
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  #1630  
Old 22nd July 2022, 17:02
Consolida Consolida is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

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Originally Posted by Moksha
Has anyone heard from Crafty Elf? Is he OK?
It's very sad to see that Crafty Elf has gone
I hope he is okay and manages to find some happiness in this life.
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  #1631  
Old 22nd July 2022, 19:58
biscuits biscuits is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

^ I also hope he's safe and well
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  #1632  
Old 5th August 2022, 22:15
Merritt Merritt is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

Feel like all I'm doing is getting up each day and trying to distract myself from my thoughts until it's time for bed. I feel sad and hopeless pretty much all the time, and that's with medication cushioning the worst of it. Years ago I'd feel sad that there wasn't much chance of anything good happening in my life, but now it'd feel frivolous to expect anything positive for my own future when almost everyone's set for incoming hardship, and even having the basics in life isn't guaranteed. Feels like the only thing that really keeps me around is the avoidance of actually having to do something about it.
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  #1633  
Old 5th August 2022, 23:11
biscuits biscuits is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

^
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  #1634  
Old 6th August 2022, 09:12
mancman71 mancman71 is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

@Merrit I am in a similar situation.
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  #1635  
Old 13th August 2022, 14:07
Bluebear Bluebear is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

^
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  #1636  
Old 13th August 2022, 14:47
biscuits biscuits is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

mancman - how are you doing at the moment?
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  #1637  
Old 13th August 2022, 18:16
Percy Percy is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

Merritt, i can relate
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  #1638  
Old Yesterday, 07:43
mancman71 mancman71 is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

@biscuits I'm in a bad way...feel like I'm having a nervous breakdown.
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  #1639  
Old Yesterday, 10:22
biscuits biscuits is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

^ those feelings are really scary and trying and travel through them on your own is a lot. I hope you feel able to reach out for some support. In this moment everything feels too much, and with help these feelings can pass and they won’t be here forever - even though it may feel that way at the moment . Please reach out for some support x
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  #1640  
Old Today, 07:27
mancman71 mancman71 is offline
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Default Re: The Suicide Thread - Trigger Warning

@biscuits Thanks for your reply.
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