Type what you're thinking about right now (11) - Page 870

Amara 94 · #**26071** 14th June 2022, 13:18

No one is coming to save me

Dougella · #**26072** 14th June 2022, 13:33

^ No, but people can help you and support you along the way

Amara 94 · #**26073** 14th June 2022, 13:35

What if you feel there is no one there to support you or understand you?

Dougella · #**26074** 14th June 2022, 13:41

^ That's difficult, but there might be places like this online where there are people who understand and relate to some of the things you're going through or struggling with. Are you feeling particularly alone at the moment? (Oh hence your name?)

Dean Winchester · #**26075** 14th June 2022, 14:31

The biggest regret I have is that I just folded to control and to my own blind daily terror and never really made any real effort to build up social networks. I'm paying the price now. I don't know what friendship would've done for me in any meaningful sense but there's one thing that's incontestable, and that is when you don't have those networks, a whole world of physical help and physical in person support is cut off from you, permanently. Emotional support as we like to use the term online is ten a penny, if anything we're drowning in it, but for the person almost completely cut off from other human beings, help that comprises community, mutual aid and care, where's that. A crack in the earth opens up and you just fall in.

Mike.Kzov · #**26076** 14th June 2022, 19:40

^ I think I know what you mean. I don't think normal people perhaps understand how isolation makes almost everything considerably more difficult in life. But it's never too late to start building those connections, as tough as it may be.

I'm thinking about going for an early evening walk

SpectralOwls · #**26077** 14th June 2022, 21:52

I'm thinking about how the heck I'm gonna get back into work again... My anxiety has been flaring up really bad and it puts me down and makes me doubt myself. I'm so scared about messing up and argh. I feel like a fish out of water.

I'd honestly prefer to do something without being involved in customer service, but I doubt I'll find anything like that nearby.

Dean Winchester · #**26078** 14th June 2022, 22:44

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mike.Kzov

^ I think I know what you mean. I don't think normal people perhaps understand how isolation makes almost everything considerably more difficult in life. But it's never too late to start building those connections, as tough as it may be.

I'm thinking about going for an early evening walk

Yeah, yr right there. Hope you enjoyed your walk. I went to the park the other day with somebody and realised I hadn't been in years! It was lovely, actually. Really nice day.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpectralOwls

I'm thinking about how the heck I'm gonna get back into work again... My anxiety has been flaring up really bad and it puts me down and makes me doubt myself. I'm so scared about messing up and argh. I feel like a fish out of water.

I'd honestly prefer to do something without being involved in customer service, but I doubt I'll find anything like that nearby.

Moving to another country is a massive adjustment and culture shock for anybody, it's not surprising you're feeling some apprehension. Takes a lot of guts. I couldn't do it.

What would you like to do, workwise?

biscuits · #**26079** 14th June 2022, 23:36

Aww Spectral. Having some time away from work gives anxiety time to rub its nasty little hands together and make us start to worry and think we can't do it. Anxiety is mean and tells lies! It will feel strange at first, but this is something you did really well at in your last job. Try to take some time to think back to some good work memories and things you overcame and did well. It will be a great way to make new friends as well - and you're so lovely, people will fall in love with you. Once you're back you'll soon remember that you can do it because you have done it

SpectralOwls · #**26080** 15th June 2022, 12:01

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dean Winchester

Moving to another country is a massive adjustment and culture shock for anybody, it's not surprising you're feeling some apprehension. Takes a lot of guts. I couldn't do it.

What would you like to do, workwise?

Yeah I won't deny that. ^_^' Moving international was perhaps one of the most stressful personal experiences of my life. So stressful, and yet somehow talking to people scares me even more.

I envy people who don't have SA gah...

Anything that's behind the scenes honestly. Even cleaning or picking. I'm set behind by the fact that 1. I'm a foreigner (though I expect that this won't be such an issue being from the US), 2. Not having a car 3. Only having a High School diploma as education. I don't know how picky they'll be about this?? Eek...

There's a part of me saying that I should go back into doing art commissions, but that won't be a lot of money. Buuut I could avoid certain fees... [cough]

Quote:

Originally Posted by biscuits

Aww Spectral. Having some time away from work gives anxiety time to rub its nasty little hands together and make us start to worry and think we can't do it. Anxiety is mean and tells lies! It will feel strange at first, but this is something you did really well at in your last job. Try to take some time to think back to some good work memories and things you overcame and did well. It will be a great way to make new friends as well - and you're so lovely, people will fall in love with you. Once you're back you'll soon remember that you can do it because you have done it

Biscuits you are too sweet!!

I will hold this close to my heart when I send in my CVs!

Percy · #**26081** 15th June 2022, 12:29

I thought you had a car SpectralOwls?

genovese · #**26082** 15th June 2022, 13:23

SPowls you worked in retail in America right?
I reckon you'd be great in a coffee shop over here. Places like Caffe Nero, Costa & your own Starbucks are on a hiring spree at the mo due to staff not returning after COVID and Brexit.

Dougella · #**26083** 15th June 2022, 13:26

^ Also supermarkets always need reliable and experienced workers, so i'm sure you could find something in that field SpectralOwls and do more of the shelf stacking etc if you preferred that.

3stacks · #**26084** 16th June 2022, 02:12

Can I go from a bad person to a good one is what I'm currently thinking. I used to make up lies for attention (big ones) and I don't know why I would ever do that because its messed up. I was definitely a toxic person and still have those tendencies so maybe I'm just rotten.

Sent from my SM-G988B using Tapatalk

Dougella · #**26085** 16th June 2022, 11:11

^ Yes, if you realise that things you did in the last weren't so great and you wouldn't do them now then you're already better! You've always seemed like a really good person on here anyway.
I think telling lies like that is quite common for teenagers especially, there must be a reason for it.

3stacks · #**26086** 16th June 2022, 23:03

^thanks! You're always kind to me. I appreciate it

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Quietman · #**26087** 17th June 2022, 18:27

Just wondering if Mellie is okay after her release from hospital?

Mellie · #**26088** 17th June 2022, 18:31

hey quietman, can't go back home yet for another 2 weeks. staff said I was going home, but they made a mistake... it wasn't up to them anyway, so stressful in here, really want to go home! hope you are okay.

Quietman · #**26089** 17th June 2022, 18:34

^ Sorry to hear that Mellie, it must be so frustrating to be told you can go home and then they change their minds, hang in there two weeks seems a long time but it will fly by.

Iâ€™m still feeling the same, I hope my mood improves soon, I hate being sad all the time.

Mellie · #**26090** 17th June 2022, 18:38

yeah it sucks, almost got hit earlier for no reason so avoiding going out of my room for now. sorry you still feel the same, keep talking to us, you've got support here.

Quietman · #**26091** 17th June 2022, 18:45

^ Thanks Mellie, stay safe and well.

Mellie · #**26092** 17th June 2022, 20:52

I'm a toxic person, being around people when I'm sleep deprived makes me angry and aggressive. but also being provoked by staff cos they are nice one minute then 2 faced the next. and they have been like this since I got here, sharing my info cos they think they can get away with it due to my mental health well f them. Im tired of being treated like crap here.

Quietman · #**26093** 17th June 2022, 21:01

^ Stay strong remember you only have two weeks to go until you can go home, I can imagine it must be so difficult for you there, they should not share your personnel details though thats a breach of confidentiality.

Percy · #**26094** 17th June 2022, 21:13

I'd report them for sharing personal information.

biscuits · #**26095** 18th June 2022, 00:49

Aw Mellie. I hope those two weeks roll around quickly for you. Crafty Elf is totally right. You're in no way a toxic person at all. It's a confusing and uncomfortable environment. You've got a lot of external factors happening around you and that makes it really challenging to feel safe and calm.

Does the ward have an occupational therapist to support with calming and relaxing sessions?I used to volunteer on an acute psychiatric ward and help the OT with their self care, meditation and relaxation sessions. They were very good.

I hope those two weeks whiz by for you, chick.

Consolida · #**26096** 18th June 2022, 00:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mellie

I'm a toxic person, being around people when I'm sleep deprived makes me angry and aggressive. but also being provoked by staff cos they are nice one minute then 2 faced the next. and they have been like this since I got here, sharing my info cos they think they can get away with it due to my mental health well f them. Im tired of being treated like crap here.

I echo exactly what Crafty Elf says. You aren't a toxic person, Mellie, you're just reacting to an unpleasant situation that you understandably don't want to be in. If I was confined to a hospital with people that didn't appear to understand me I'd be feeling angry too. Some of the staff sound rather unprofessional to say the least!
Try to focus on getting well and going home in 2 weeks time when you'll be back in your own comfy bed and having a nice undisturbed nights sleep

Mellie · #**26097** 18th June 2022, 07:10

Thanks all, I appreciate everyone's replies. I'm not normally like this it's just they also ignore people and all patients have complained about them too that they aren't getting any help. I will try my best to stay calm so I can get out of here but I almost got pushed again by another patient. People don't like me here.

biscuits · #**26098** 18th June 2022, 07:37

^

that does not sound like a nice environment to be in

we all like you and care about you here

Quietman · #**26099** 18th June 2022, 07:58

Been woken up at 5:00am, with loud music vibrating the whole house. Wondering whats going on.

^ Sorry your experiencing these troubles Mellie, my own personal experiences of the NHS and there hospitals arenâ€™t great, hang on in there you donâ€™t have long to go now.

biscuits · #**26100** 18th June 2022, 08:02

^ where's it coming from? When I lived in a city every few Sundays I'd be woken up by a marching band going past the window. To be fair it was in my depressed days, so it was probably a reasonable hour like 11am hehe

I have also just woken up - with a swollen face.