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  #1  
Old 1st August 2021, 02:43
Marie8 Marie8 is offline
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Default CBT feeling really overwhelmed

I started having cbt again this month. It's over the phone but I'm still finding it very overwhelming and not sure it's going to work for me, my mind is so cluttered and I don't know how to open up and express myself. I find it really awkward and don't know how to say I'm feeling down. She asks me questions and I give limited responses or say 'I'm not sure' because my mind is just blank and I can't process things very quickly. I've been getting a lot of negative thoughts like it's not going to work, that I'm beyond help and I've been feeling so overwhelmed by them this week. Last appointment she said my score was lower than the previous one (from the cbt form I fill in before each session), so things were heading in the right direction, but I honestly didn't feel like it and I didn't feel I could say that, I think I just said 'ok' as didn't know what else to say in the moment.

I was supposed to have an appointment the other day, but missed it. I did remember about it but that day I felt so stressed and anxious I just couldn't face it. The counsellor left a couple of messages on my phone, which I still feel too anxious to listen to. I know I should have called up before the appointment to tell them I wasn't up to it but I felt too anxious and still haven't been able to call. I received a letter yesterday saying if I don't contact them within 7 days, or if I miss a second appointment they will assume I no longer wish to use the service. This is making me feel even more stressed and under pressure, as surely missing appointments is a sign that the anxiety/depressions might be worse. It's something I've always needed support with, how to better organise myself/plan my days and actually stick to it and not let the anxiety take control. I just find it so difficult, so I'm not feeling very positive that the cbt will help. Maybe it means I need a different type of therapy, but I don't know what else is available through the nhs.

Just wondered if this happened to anyone else? Were you offered a different type of therapy if cbt didn't work out? This is my second attempt with cbt (last had from around Oct 2019 and stopped the week 1st lockdown started), so if this doesn't work out is that it, or will I be able to self refer again in the future?
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  #2  
Old 1st August 2021, 03:04
AnxiousExtrovert AnxiousExtrovert is offline
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Default Re: CBT feeling really overwhelmed

Hi marie

I'm sorry to hear you aren't feeling good.

First I must say I can't stand those questionnaire things where you have to rate how you've been feeling in the last week. I really think they are terrible.

Do you find you feel overwhelmed mentally because you have so much built up trauma or stress you almost don't even know where to start?

I certainly feel that way myself, so much unresolved trauma and baggage it's overwhelming. And I don't find cbt helpful myself for this reason. I feel like I can't think straight with so much going on in my mind.

Or do you think it's for other reasons you are overwhelmed?
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  #3  
Old 1st August 2021, 12:39
Dougella Dougella is offline
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Default Re: CBT feeling really overwhelmed

It's ok to say this to the therapist. You can even put it in a message if that's easier, say you are feeling overwhelmed and struggling to answer the questions and having a lot of negative thoughts. They should be able to take this onboard and go a bit slower or even discuss whether CBT is the appropriate type of therapy for you at the moment. This doesn't mean you're failing or doing anything wrong!

I think something that's not discussed much is that beginning therapy can be very difficult, it's hard enough to talk to someone if you have SA anyway but to talk about things that are personal and to trust someone can take some time. You can also feel worse than before to start with because just interacting with the therapist can be really hard. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you or you're beyond help, it shows really that you need help
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Old 2nd August 2021, 21:25
Marie8 Marie8 is offline
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Default Re: CBT feeling really overwhelmed

I really hate those questionnaires, it seem pointless filling it in as they never ask me questions about my answers. They just say something like... this week your score was so and so which is better than last week... or something alone those lines. I also feel the exercises take up a lot of time and I can't be bothered doing them. I know they say you need to put effort into it for it to be effective, but I can never motivate myself enough and this is what I really need help with.

Yes that's exactly it, I don't know where to begin or how to explain my thoughts they are all jumbled up and it feels to much and exhausting. If I was more honest and said I wasn't feeling ok I wouldn't be able to really explain why. My thoughts are always going round and round and head feels so full, I can never think clearly. I think it's the main reason I struggle with communication and talking out loud, even writing here it doesn't sound right, but it's the only way I can describe it. I'm really not sure cbt will work for me and think I need to look into other options. I've always been so reluctant to try meds, but maybe I need to. I have health anxiety too and worry a lot about side effects which is the main reason I haven't tried them.
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  #5  
Old 2nd August 2021, 21:36
Marie8 Marie8 is offline
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Default Re: CBT feeling really overwhelmed

Yeah I think putting it in a message will be better, or writing it all down and saying it over the phone. I find thinking/talking on the spot so difficult and get so anxious on the phone. I always feel like I just want to call to end as quickly as possible. I probably need to give it more time rather than giving up so quickly. I still need to contact them which I'm planning to do tomorrow, but have so much on my mind all the time I find it hard to keep track of time, so worry I'll miss the 7 days and will have to reapply for the therapy.
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  #6  
Old 3rd August 2021, 19:22
Clumsy* Clumsy* is offline
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Default Re: CBT feeling really overwhelmed

Hi Marie8,

I'm so sorry that you're struggling so much. I hope that you were able to leave that voice message today to explain how you feel.

All I wanted to say is that everything you describe makes total sense to people who suffer anxiety and a therapist will understand that too and it is their job to help you.
So I hope it helps you feel more confident to explain to them. I understand that talking on the spot is very difficult when you start out, so please explain that in your voice message, so maybe they could communicate with you via email?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marie8
as surely missing appointments is a sign that the anxiety/depressions might be worse.
You're completely right and I would imagine that therapists know that too, but maybe they're not allowed to assume and they can't help unless the patient lets them know?

Good luck
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  #7  
Old 4th August 2021, 02:29
AnxiousExtrovert AnxiousExtrovert is offline
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Default Re: CBT feeling really overwhelmed

I can certainly relate to what you're saying Marie. It's one of the biggest issues I had with the NHS cbt offering. Some of my trauma or confusion has been going on so long and buried so deep that it's extremely hard to articulate and know what to discuss and where to start.

I can feel it all in my mind with certain events that really affected and triggered me and the way they directly altered my mental health and trajectory. The hard part is trying to explain all those events and working out what parts are relevent to focus on in the 45 min 6 week sessions!

Then there are those questionnaires at the start which take up another 10 minutes! That's why I realized those cbt sessions weren't appropriate for me because I felt like I was getting no where and then felt a failure.

So yes my thoughts feel very overloaded and jumbled and I can relate a lot to this. Its very common with stress and mental health.
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