~Our Goals!~ Mark I

I've got a doctors appointment for next week it only took me about 15 years to get up the courage! my next goal is to not chicken out and make sure I actually go...

[CheshireChaz]

Good luck to the both of us mousey!!

gaaaar, So Nervous!!!!
We can do it.
we can do it lol

[Shanibandangle]

Originally Posted by mousey

I've got a doctors appointment for next week it only took me about 15 years to get up the courage! my next goal is to not chicken out and make sure I actually go...

Good luck. I went to the doctors today and the only scary thing was the amount of old people drowning out the waiting room.

[Bluegent]

Good thread

I have a couple of goals

March- Go for a walk and use the cross trainer at least every other day. This should get me prepared for the next goal.

April to June- Loss 20 pounds, i also want to be fit enough to be using my bike around this time so i can cycle parts of the south downs.

[Spectrelight]

I'm moving on Saturday so I'm going to try and socialise with my new housemates instead of avoiding the kitchen and lounge if anybody else is in there and eating in my room like I do at the moment.

[Gem]

i have the chance to finish my NVQ2 today, the last time i did it i had a panic attack and couldn't. I have to go to Shelleys house and do about 4 assessments with the animals, its doing it in front of everyone and the fear of failing and embarassing myself that scares me so my goal is to go through with it and complete my NVQ.

good luck today Charlie xx

Originally Posted by CheshireChaz

Good luck to the both of us mousey!!

gaaaar, So Nervous!!!!
We can do it.
we can do it lol

Originally Posted by Shanibandangle

Good luck. I went to the doctors today and the only scary thing was the amount of old people drowning out the waiting room.

Thanks Good luck everyone!

[trulyblue]

I love the idea of this thread
Okay so im gonna start with small goals i must achieve this week.
1) Phone up my friend who i havent spoken to in a while have been putting this off for weeks now
2) must phone opticians to arrange an eye test
3) Try to be a bit more social at a party im attending this friday eekkk!

[CheshireChaz]

goal achieved..

God i am exhausted. Im gonna go crash now and alternate between sleeping and crying for a few hours

see yu later

[TheOneWhoKnocks]

goal achieved..

God i am exhausted. Im gonna go crash now and alternate between sleeping and crying for a few hours

see yu later

Well done!

Originally Posted by CheshireChaz

goal achieved..

God i am exhausted. Im gonna go crash now and alternate between sleeping and crying for a few hours

see yu later

well done Charlie hope you're ok

[CheshireChaz]

hey guys,
thanks
Im not okay, but, you know
survivin lol

[Shanibandangle]

This is an achievement rather, but today whilst I was walking home, a couple asked me if I knew if there was a Somerfield about.

Instead or murmuring my usual "idnosorree" I actually told them that there had been but it had been shut down. They then asked me if there was a supermarket near whereby I explained that there was one in the place of the old Somerfield.

:D

[gettingthere]

Originally Posted by CheshireChaz

hey guys,
thanks
Im not okay, but, you know
survivin lol

Well done for achieving you goal. I hope you feel better tomorrow.

My goals are:
1) to try and post on SAUK at least once a day,
2) to read the anxiety and phobia workbook by Edmund Bourne (it's quite good)
3) survive a meeting at work this week.

[Winnie57]

Good luck with your goals everyone - and well done to Chaz for achieving yours

All the best with the workmen Gecko


My goal for today: strike up a conversation with someone at work

[challangerchris]

My goal for today is to let my emotions flow to my physciatrist this afternoon and to listen better to what she says to me, instead of worrying about what I've just said to her.

[gingercat]

Mischief Managed - err, I mean, goal achieved . Going to have to keep it up though. Maybe I should make it a goal to do it every day I'm in the office.

Well done Chaz, Gecko, hellotiger and anyone else who's achieved their goals, and good luck to the rest of you!

[stripeymouse]

i reckon you were right in the first place chaz - we need this thread to be more than just a thread so everyone can have a separate thread within it for their goals..as it is i'm finding it a daunting thread to go into coz there's *so* much information to take in...which is a shame coz i think it's a really good idea

[CheshireChaz]

you need to forward your thoughts to the mods
I tried to say from the off but they weren't having it.
They wanted goals to go into the recovery room as it is but i think goals threads AND self help threads AND treatment threads all in one place would be Vry messy.

If they see that alot of us think ther should be a goals sub-section to the Recovery room then they may will do it

So..
you know wot to do lol- Get PMing!

[Shanibandangle]

I liked the process in my "What have you achieved today?" thread where we posted what we had achieved and below that, targets for tomorrow. That was nice and simple, no?

If it were up to me I would ban all "Goals" threads anyway. I realise now that setting myself goals simply wraps me up in my misery even further. You put pressure on yourself when you set goals, more so when you don't achieve them. If we continue to ignore the negative aspects of our mind, and not pay attention, they will go away.

But setting yourself a goal simply sets it in stone that you have something to overcome. The key is to trick your brain into thinking there's absolutely nothing wrong with you.

[CheshireChaz]

Originally Posted by Shanibandangle

If it were up to me I would ban all "Goals" threads anyway. I realise now that setting myself goals simply wraps me up in my misery even further. You put pressure on yourself when you set goals, more so when you don't achieve them. If we continue to ignore the negative aspects of our mind, and not pay attention, they will go away.

But setting yourself a goal simply sets it in stone that you have something to overcome. The key is to trick your brain into thinking there's absolutely nothing wrong with you.

Im sorry you don't like the thread, if you don't like the thread tho there is no need to post that you don't, we're not posting here to debate stuff, we're just trying to be spread positivity coz there's allready more than enough negativity around =[

"if we continue to ignore the negative aspects of our mind"

There's nothing in this thread thats telling you to ignore your negative thoughts. Its known that we should address our negative thoughts/beliefs and challenge them.

This thread is about making small, hopefully, achievable goals for yourself and gradually reducing our safety behaviors so that we can all slowly and steadily make our way onwards and upwards.

Its basically the same principal as making an Anxiety Ladder, an internationally known method of tackling Anxiety Disorders, and is currently used by the NHS.

You start small, and work your way up, at your own pace, and if you don't make it
So what ?
Its your choice, and your choice alone, whether or not you beat yourself up about it. We're all here to support one another, you wouldn't mock someone else for "failing" a goal - so why would you mock yourself ??

If people keep employing safety behaviours and keep avoiding they will keep the vicious cycle of Social Anxiety going.

[Shanibandangle]

Originally Posted by CheshireChaz

Im sorry you don't like the thread, if you don't like the thread tho there is no need to post that you don't, we're not posting here to debate stuff, we're just trying to be spread positivity coz there's allready more than enough negativity around =[

"if we continue to ignore the negative aspects of our mind"

There's nothing in this thread thats telling you to ignore your negative thoughts. Its known that we should address our negative thoughts/beliefs and challenge them.

This thread is about making small, hopefully, achievable goals for yourself and gradually reducing our safety behaviors so that we can all slowly and steadily make our way onwards and upwards.

Its basically the same principal as making an Anxiety Ladder, an internationally known method of tackling Anxiety Disorders, and is currently used by the NHS.

You start small, and work your way up, at your own pace, and if you don't make it
So what ?
Its your choice, and your choice alone, whether or not you beat yourself up about it. We're all here to support one another, you wouldn't mock someone else for "failing" a goal - so why would you mock yourself ??

If people keep employing safety behaviours and keep avoiding they will keep the vicious cycle of Social Anxiety going.

I'm bemused at why you found my comment criticising. That's my recent belief about making goals for myself, I use the term "you" as a generalisation. It was just my opinion, obviously it doesn't account for everyone else. If anything, I think I gave good advice, i've come really far based on that judgement.

[CheshireChaz]

nah dnt worry mate i didn't think you directly criticising anyone at all, just didn't agree with phrases like "ban all goal threads" and you also seemed to making out setting goals was a ultimately destructive thing to do

But anyway, i dnt wanna debate it lol, dnt want to clog this topic with theories etc. =]
Once again : no worries bud, i didn't think you were getting at anyone, just disagreed with what you were saying is all

[Undecided]

Originally Posted by AAAli

Tomorrow goal: be relaxed as possible the whole day, make an effort to talk to people as much as possible, be slightly late for lecture (normally come in 1 hour early as trains only every hour as I don't like everyone looking at me when I come in late)

I can definitely relate to that! The buses I caught only ran every hour so I would always choose coming in early and killing time for 50 minutes over walking into a packed room and having people stare at you. Decided it was the lesser of two evils!

[Undecided]

My goals for March are to make a Doctor's appointment as it's something I've been putting off for months and to go at least one social anxiety meet.

I'm meeting up with someone tommorow and my goals for then are to:

1) Have a good time
2) Not beat myself up everytime there's an awkward silence
3) Not to stumble over my words when ordering food/drink etc

[AAAli]

Originally Posted by AAAli

Longterm goal: Girlfriend, put on 1 stone
Month goal: Start driving lessons
Fortnight goal: Go out drinking with mates
Week goal: To go get my hair cut, or at least make the appointment (hate doing it)Done
Tomorrow goal: be relaxed as possible the whole day, make an effort to talk to people as much as possible, be slightly late for lecture (normally come in 1 hour early as trains only every hour as I don't like everyone looking at me when I come in late) Done
Today goal: Learn about relaxation techniques Done

Managed to achieve a few of my goals there

I can definitely relate to that! The buses I caught only ran every hour so I would always choose coming in early and killing time for 50 minutes over walking into a packed room and having people stare at you. Decided it was the lesser of two evils!

Yeah exactly and when you get in early you can sit at the back (easy to see if people are looking at you or not, I always think people behind me are talking about me, esp when they laugh). But I realised it is a safety behaviour and waking up an hour early is a pain.
Luckily in this case I met 3 friends on the way in so it made it much easier.

Thanks CheshireChaz, as i said I am trying to get the confidence to even phone up, I know absolutely nothing about driving (I really mean nothing) and i am guessing they will presume I know more than I do

@Gecko - well done with the workmen

So some new goals:
6Month goal put on 1 stone
Summer Goal: Get a job
Month goal: Start driving lessons, Go out drinking with mates
Week goal: Goto bank,acutally eat out rather than going hungry,activate card over phone.
Tommorow Goal: Not worry (try to distract myself)
Today goal: Try to think of more goals

[stripeymouse]

Originally Posted by CheshireChaz

you need to forward your thoughts to the mods
I tried to say from the off but they weren't having it.
They wanted goals to go into the recovery room as it is but i think goals threads AND self help threads AND treatment threads all in one place would be Vry messy.

If they see that alot of us think ther should be a goals sub-section to the Recovery room then they may will do it

So..
you know wot to do lol- Get PMing!

how do i do that? just pick a mod and pm them?

[CheshireChaz]

Just wanna appologise for not commenting on all the recent entries,
the stuff im talking about with my counselor is VRY difficult and im feeling vry low soz
so being kind of quiet atm

[trulyblue]

Originally Posted by trulyblue

I love the idea of this thread
Okay so im gonna start with small goals i must achieve this week.
1) Phone up my friend who i havent spoken to in a while have been putting this off for weeks now
2) must phone opticians to arrange an eye test
3) Try to be a bit more social at a party im attending this friday eekkk!

Conrats to everyone that have achieved their goals

So ive managed to achieve No 1) went today was fine didnt really have any anxiety at the opticians

No.2) Kinda chickened out on this one. I texted my friend instead of phoning her but at least i made contact with her and i had quite a lot of good stuff to tell her so that gave me a boost today.

No3) is still to come.... let you know how it goes...

Chesirechaz for you

[TheOneWhoKnocks]

Thanks CheshireChaz, as i said I am trying to get the confidence to even phone up, I know absolutely nothing about driving (I really mean nothing) and i am guessing they will presume I know more than I do

Don't worry about it, They won't expect you to know anything unless you tell them that you do. Everyone starts at the bottom, they will teach hundreds of people who have no idea what they are doing. Its what your paying them for right? Oh, and don't go with BSM or the AA. They steal all your monies.