Stood up to my Dad

firewoman · #1 31st July 2006, 17:44

For the first time in my life I have stood up to my Dad. He asks me to do things I don't feel happy with. Nothing majorly dodgy, just things that go against my principles. Too often I have just gone along with it cos I thought I owed it to him, he's my Dad etc etc.

But looking at how other people's parents treat them, most would never dream of putting their kids in a situation. So, I realised I'd been letting him manipulate me for far too long, and he was using my good nature to suit himself. I told him today that I wasn't prepared to do it any longer. It runs the risk of him cutting me off, but hey that's the price I pay.

My shrink also made me realise that I can't speak up for myself and was always overly worried about what the consequences would be if I did. Anyway, I have decided to speak out more, and stick up for myself, even though it's bloomin not easy.

But today I feel like I've reached a turning point, and I feel quite powerful now I've managed to stick up for myself with my Dad.

Maybe not so much an SA triumph, as an assertiveness one, but hey, I wanted to share it anyway.

Kevin Hodge · #2 31st July 2006, 18:33

that's great firewoman!

i have general problems standing up to people as well. but standing up to your parents can be a big one, because your behaviour with them often goes back as long as you have existed.

hope that it turns out all right for you, ie that your dad starts respecting you a bit more.

ShyDoll · #3 31st July 2006, 18:47

Well done firewoman. May not be a SA issue but it's good in the way that you were assertive..
I would stand up to my dad more but i get aggressive not assertive =(.

Winnie57 · #4 31st July 2006, 18:58

Well done firewoman! My dad was the domineering sort, it was almost impossible to stand up to him. I do know what it's like being manipulated by people.

Occultus · #5 31st July 2006, 19:00

Well done Firewoman

Having had an alcoholic father, I know exactly where you are coming from. Good for you. I hope things work out well for you

Allgood · #6 31st July 2006, 20:58

How interesting...I also have quite a dominant dad and have found it hard 2 stand up to him. It may not sound SA related but I think it actually is/has been a significant factor that feeds into how I relate to other people, people in authority etc.

Well done Firewoman, it'll do your confidence and sense of self the world of good

Sara B · #7 5th August 2006, 04:22

Well done, firewoman.

Yes, I can relate to that too.